Thursday, December 29, 2011

“The simplest things are often the truest.” - Richard Bach

Spartan Shape-Up, Day 161:

It's a crazy winter ice storm here in VT, BlogLand. THAT certainly killed my run plans for today. Working all kinds of overtime at work, and the winter darkness has really trashed my schedule. It's screwing with my sleep, forcing me to go to different CrossFit classes (and I'm sorry, I tried... I can NOT be at the gym at 6am.), and generally mucking up the situation. Soon it will all even out... but until then, I am finding myself in a jam, sometimes, with workouts.
What do you do when you get home from work at 7:40pm, have dinner, and still haven't WOD'd yet?
You make an off-hand comment to the GT about the ice-storm killing your run-plans.... and Boom. You find yourself getting assigned a modified Crossfit Cindy:
It's a 20 Min. AMRAP:
5 Pull-Ups (although, since I don't have a bar, I was assigned squat thrusts to sub in, instead)
10 Push Ups (on my knees)
15 Air Squats
So, I am proud to say, I successfully managed 13 rounds.
Unfortunately, my t-rex arms are still the limiting factor. I can bust out and beast through squats and such, but push-ups really test me. I was hoping to hit 15 rounds, but those damn push ups gave me a run for my money... during the last few rounds, I definitely had to take breaks to get through 10 at a time (you know, the patented "down dog" position... lol). Ugh. I find that frustrating, but one thing at a time... the upper body stuff is currently my Achilles heel to be conquered.

In other news, I don't have too much to report... I did have a positive realization over the holidays, though. Every single holiday to date, I've played the "OMFG, I have nothing to wear, I look HORRIBLE" and just generally surviving them, always feeling a bit ashamed of how I looked. This year, I looked in the mirror and was not horrified (big step) and saw something positive - I saw all the early morning runs, the sweat puddles at CrossFit, the 50 days of  "No Bread" and the endless days of aching hamstrings. This is what I saw:
L: 284#.... R: 209 (ish) #

It was weird, I shared this on FB, and one comment in particular hit home with me (I'm paraphrasing): You went from Sad to Sassy!
... which was SO TRUE. SO true. I still have a LONG way to go, a lot of muscle to build, etc. but I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I AM happier. Finally the person I really am inside is less and less stifled by my physical capabilities. Along with that, I'm learning that there is almost NOTHING I can't do, if I try. I am more capable than I ever imagined. I know that all sounds cliche, but it is the absolute truth. I never imagined, in my wildest dreams, that I would find myself at this place. I FEEL GOOD. Healthy. Strong. Confident. 

This is no to be shameless self-promotion, but I believe it is important to take stock in the milestones in your journey. I am still not satisfied with what I see in the mirror, but I have to acknowledge the fact that now, more often, I can see the progress.   Some days, now, I even see "pretty". THAT, BlogLand, is huge. It has been a very long time (if ever) that I was proud of what I looked like. Now, I love when people ask me about what I'm doing... I talk to them about training, about Spartan Race, about the craziness that I'm up to. I LOVE the look on their face when they are in absolute shock... 

Let me tell you BlogLand, it's not a lie... it CAN be done. If I can go from sad, unhealthy, inactive, depressed and surrounded by negatives in my life.... to (more) fit, eating well, running significant mileage, lifting heavy things, feeling (mostly!) positive and changing my surroundings to the positive things in life.... YOU can do this too. 

Just take One day at a time. Just ONE. Take each Hour or each minute, if you need to. 

Tomorrow, I am going to........

For me, my tomorrow plan is to get up and check out the weather... HOPEfully, I'll be able to get a morning run in. If only my calves (which are currently compressed in my hot pink calf sleeves!) would chill out, all would be well. 

Now, to rest. Back at Living out Loud in the morning... 

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