‎"Some people see things as they are and say "Why." I dream things that never were and say "Why not." ~George Bernard Shaw

Spartan Shape-Up, Day 219:

Anyone that reads my blog regularly must regard me as mildly bi-polar, BlogLand. The truth is, I'm an emotional being (I'm a Cancer, ruled by the water and the moon... shout out to all my fellow crabs! woot woot!) and those emotions can change quickly... particularly when I'm stressed, or left to my own (non-existent) logical capabilities. And really, it's not that have crazy mood swings, it's just that I'm "emotionally spontaneous."

Having said that, Gold Star to anyone who made it through yesterday's post. It was all true, it was all honest and what I was feeling last night, but some how, having the light of day hit it (things are so different in the evening, don't you think?) made it seem a little less daunting.

Plus, although I was freaking out ("emotional spillage"), sometimes I just need to get it all OUT of my head, so that I can look at it more objectively. From a more rational standpoint, and from some exceedingly patient, unruffleable help (seriously, do you know that you're the unfailing Lighthouse for my Tiny Rowboat, on my giant, tumultuous, Emotional Sea, Muffin?), I managed to pick it all up today, and reevaluate. *deep breath*

I have made a lot of progress. I still have 70 days until my first major event. I have the tools at hand to be successful, I must just use them. I think I just needed a breakdown, to reinforce the fact that I needed to recommit 100%. I need to stop looking around at everyone else (and letting their accomplishments make me feel inadequate), realize that I am a lot more capable than I even really realize, STFU and get down to business. I have 70 days to get even more awesome.

In light of that positive upswing, I decided to re-tackle the 7 Min of Burpees challenge tomorrow, and hit 60. Improve upon yesterday's 58.
And because 7 minutes of Burpees is a new kind of hell:

Having said all of that, it's time to move on to the really mentally refreshing run I took this evening. I HAD A BUDDY!! (check her out over here at Immutable and Impossible )!! BlogLand, you have no idea what that does for a social creature like myself. I have "learned" to go it alone, run my own PR's into the ground, chase invisible finish lines and log the miles all by myself, under my own steam and motivation... but it is so much more pleasant when occasionally, you have some company.

It was a perfectly snow-tastic sort of evening. Big, heavy, wet snow fell pretty steadily (at times, quite heavily...), as I left my door around 6pm. It would be a quick (about .66 mile) run over to meet my buddy, and then off we'd be. I should mention that the "quick" .66 mile run also involved a hill sprint. Why? because there was a big hill. What makes things go by faster? Sprinting them. Seemed like a plan.

After a strong sprint, I died for a second at the top of the hill, located my buddy and off we went, looping through various areas of the pretty part of my city. The highlight: jogging the paths in a big cemetery, at dusk. No seriously, it was quiet, the paths were wide, and it was neat.....
To chitter-chatter while out and about really was a refreshing change. My legs felt good, I laughed, ran and laughed and ran some more.
We navigated a long, slow climb on the way home, and I decided I'm going to need to practice and conquer this hill. It's the one that had me almost puking in the crosswalk last week, remember? Oh yeah, Hill... I'm coming for you.

Finally, I found myself parting from my buddy and turning for home. Just .66 miles... I thought I should probably pick up the pace for this. After getting down the now-snow-covered big hill I had sprinted up earlier, I kicked it in gear and sprinted the flat 1/2 mile back to my house. I ran hard until my lungs felt like they might explode, and I ran some more. My tracker seems to think I hit around 7:30 min/mi. or 8 min/mi. at this point. Yeeehaww!! Can't keep that up over a distance, but sometimes, it just feels good to open up and leave it all out there on the sidewalk.

Upon returning home, I figured I better document this experience:

That is a snow-chunk in my hair, snowflakes falling, and an unplowed road in the background. AHHH yes.

Now, I must say, I have not been this soaked coming home from a run, in recent memory. Water-soaked. My hair was tripping, my top layers were drenched.... but it was a relatively warm evening, and I had FUN. I leaped over a hedge, dodged gravestones, did some hill sprints and got my ass in gear... what's not to love?

Total mileage for me tonight, about 3.5 miles. Total benefit tonight's run had on my mental status: Priceless.

With that, I leave you for SleepyLand, my Dears... We shall see what tomorrow will bring...

"Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go." ~T.S. Eliot

Spartan Shape-Up, Day 218:

I feel all off kilter, BlogLand. That hamstring thing screwed up my whole "schedule" and now it's all askew. Ack. More on this later.

This morning I got up and (rather than run in the cold ice-rain) decided to do WOD #1 of the CrossFit Open Qualifier... My gym is running them, but I'm not participating, as there are a couple of weekends I can't be there for the competitions... HOWEVER, doesn't mean I can't follow along the WOD's.

WOD #1: 7 minutes of Burpees. Count Reps.

... This is like the 7th layer of Hell in Aja-Land. We all know how much I LOVE and ADORE Burpees (...of Death!). But, I decided since I had copped out (?!) on my run, I better get after this.

Kitchen timer set, music on, Inov-8's on (I learned the hard way that numerous burpees, barefoot, on carpet is a blister-tastic idea...). And off I went.
Now, I recently did a burpee-benchmark at the gym - one full minute of burpees. I rocked 22 burpees in that minute. Of course, that's just one minute. Although, I figured, hey, even if I did 15 in a minute, that puts me at like 105 in 7 minutes... but if I allow for slow-down, maybe like 90 would be a good number to shoot for? That seemed rational to me.

58.

ONLY 58. I chastised myself for stopping to breathe. I was/am disappointed. That was no where NEAR 90. I was frustrated. Could I have done better? Yeah, maybe if I warmed up more, or something, maybe I could've gotten to 65 or something... but I don't see that I could've miraculously pulled out 70, even.
This felt like a GIANT slap with Cold, Hard, Reality.

... I feel like I'm talking a good show, lately, but I'm not delivering.  Or at least not delivering like I should be.

This is what happens in the brain of a competitive person (who has some insecurities around this fitness stuff, anyway), when they "lose" as I did with myself and the burpee challenge.

Suddenly I thought of all the events I'm signed up for and how I'm not ready. How my training for the last two months has been inconsistent (at best) for no reason I would consider adequate (aside from this latest hamstring thing). How I haven't seen the progress I imagined, because I'm not doing the work. How my weight-loss has stopped (am I up a bit!?), because I've gotten slightly less diligent on the food and am not WOD'ing to the point I should be to burn it off.
I thought of the pull ups I still can't do. But haven't been practicing like I planned...
I thought of the morning WOD's I've been sleeping through (and not always making up at night)...
I thought of the events I'm going to be at with a lot of people I don't want to look stupid and unprepared in front of...

I've had plenty of time, but my focus has gotten distracted. I'd blame it on the season... but, excuses don't do anyone any good.

I'm scared, BlogLand. I made all these promises to myself (I'm going to rock a Spartan Race! I'm going to check out CMC! I'm going to do a pull up on my birthday! I'm going to be under 200# by March 15!), and I feel like I'm not going to get there. What happens if I don't make them?

*deep breath*

I went to work. No literally, like my job. Then something crazy happened. Someone asked me to be the 4th on their Relay team for a big marathon up here in May: The Key Bank VT City Marathon. I'd have to run a leg of about 5.5 miles. As a knee-jerk reaction, I said Sure! I'd love to!... and I meant it at the time. How cool would that be?! Run a piece of a marathon (rumor has it I might have the finish leg!)!..... Then I freaked out, in the light of this morning's Epic Fail. I haven't been running consistently. I'm not fast, at all. I don't want to be the Weak Link in the team. (Fat Chick Syndrome flared up HARDCORE) WTF was I THINKING?!

I wanted to throw up a bit. (we're all about honesty here, BlogLand).

What I want to say now is a bunch of inspirational stuff about how I'm re-focused and have my eyes on the prize and all that. But really, I'm still freaking out, internally. About all of this. It's been really hard to go it alone with all of this, lately, and these are the times I need people the worst. When I'm in my own head and saying the wrong things. I know I'll be "fine" at all of this... but I'm not happy with "fine". I have goals, and I want to get to them... but I can't seem to kick my ass the right way, lately.

Argh. Things I'm thinking, right now:
1) ... I think I'm going to spare you all from this one.
2) I need more fitness friends near me. I am pushing hard (am I?) and doing this for me... but as a social creature, always going it ALONE is draining. CrossFit classes are a life-saver here, even though I can't seem to find any outside-of-class opportunities.
3) I feel really worked up about all this, lately. Yes, I stress about theses things, Yes, I put more pressure on myself than maybe I should. Yes, I should relax about this stuff. Sorry, I don't roll like that. I'm going to be worked up, until I can get it sorted out. Need to enlist the GT and get a plan going, so the mind can quiet, stop freaking out, and get back down to business.
4) This probably all sounds like a big ramble-rant, which seems silly, over some BURPEES?
5) I need to go to bed.

On which note, I think I shall conclude tonight's entry with at least a promise to saddle up tomorrow and get back down to business. It's supposed to be some kind of crazy snow-storm, so it may be an at-home WOD night.

No Excuses, Self.

"The chief cause of failure and unhappiness is trading what we want most for what we want at the moment."

Spartan Shape-Up, Day 196:
(Ending week 28)

Back at it today, BlogLand! I'm not going to lie, it took everything I had to get out of bed this morning, after 5.5 hours of sleep... HOWEVER... apparently, on sheer will alone, you can do this. Before I went to bed last night, I spent some time laying there, reflecting on my goals and motivations and WTF was causing me to lose sight of those, recently.

Noise.

Just background noise. Things that don't matter, shouldn't matter, things I can't do anything about, things that are constants... just noise. It's all those things that clutter your brain and make you feel stressed or anxious or rushed, or some combination there of. Most of the time, these things are superfluous. At least, for me, right now, they were. I needed to stop, and reassess. I needed to make a few concrete plans to deal with some legit Life Stuff, and then approach those plans one step at a time. There is no use projecting out all the possible outcomes and failures (because you never project the good things, do you?), because you're not there yet.

I can't say I have it all in line, yet... but I'm getting there. I feel better, calmer, more centered about most things. If I can sort of stay on this track, keep my schedule together and avoid craziness for a couple of weeks, I should be golden! (or at least better!)

Something I found and liked, today:

SO... getting up today, it was CrossFit day! As I ran out of my house this morning, I found a rainy 40 something degree morning. Hello, Winter? Happy February in Vermont? What?! ... However, it was nice not to freeze my butt off on the way to the gym.

Today's Crossfit Time looked like this:

Warm-Up: The CrossFit Warm-Up x 2
(This is a combination of 10 movements - from air squats to high knees, to jumping jacks to a few push ups.)

Today's Buy-In: Two, 1-minute Benchmarks
For these two benchmarks, I decided to try out a few benchmarks I hadn't attempted before.
First, 1 Min Row: 300M (I think I could've done more here. hmm.)
Next, 1 Min Push-Ups: 33 . T-Rex Hates Push-ups. Let's not forget that. These push ups weren't real pretty, and they were on my knees, and there were some breaks in there... but I got the job done, I think. Definitely hoping to see improvement in this number in a few months. C'mon T-rex Arms!!

WOD: 7 Rounds, for time, of:
- 7 Deadlifts (using 100# for me)
- 7 L-Pull Ups

WELL. Let's stop and talk about this for a minute. First, I was like "YAY!" because deadlifts are something I can do. I still have a little trouble gauging how much I should lift in a WOD, though. Like, this 100# deadlift was easily handled, for me. The "prescribed" weight for women was 155#, for reference. I probably should've done more, in hindsight... hmm. You know it's bad when your 7 deadlifts are the "rest" portion of the WOD.

Next, we had 7 L-Pull Ups. Yeah, so I can't do those... YET (think positive!). But instead of doing jumping pull ups to really scale it down, I tried something to challenge myself a little more: I used a heavy band to help me through pull ups. I am pretty sure I am going to sling-shot myself into the ceiling with those things, sometimes, which is why I avoid them... but it definitely challenges me a little more on pull ups. You can't "cheat" those kind of pull ups, which I notice I have to be careful of not doing during a (tired) jumping pull up (by just jumping, and not using my arms as much).

Since a pull-up, much less and L sit one, is challenging enough for me, I stuck with just the banded pull up for this WOD. I pretty much wanted to die, every time. T-rex hates Pull Ups, too. Just saying. Got it done though, in a respectable 11:07min. I am relatively unconcerned with the time, but since we wrote it down, I figured I'd include it.

Just for kicks, we also had an After Party: 100 sit-ups
I notice I'm a little better on these than I have been. Marginally. C'mon Abs of Steel!

So, I felt pretty good coming out of CrossFit today. Really glad I got there. I feel like it was essential to get myself out of this ridiculous rut. I am owning the fact that there may have to be these temporary "ruts"... but, I am happy to report that even my "ruts" were more active and healthier than Old Me a couple of years ago.

Having said that, I'm tired. Must go to bed. My days are Loooonng.

Things that are on the back of my mind for consideration (upcoming blogs, for sure!):
Taking on a GoRuck Challenge 
Finding a good 10K to Race

“Real difficulties can be overcome; it is only the imaginary ones that are unconquerable.” -Theodore N. Vail

Spartan Shape-Up, Day 192:

Hey BlogLand.... so, I'm not dead, I swear. I just sort of fell off the wagon (...and got run over by it), for a day or two. BUT, I have regrouped, gotten my head back in the right place, and I was back at it today, full force.

I must admit, the winter and my sleeping issues are really ruining my life right now. For reasons I won't go into here, for sake of your sanity, it's really been derailing my training. I just looked at my tracking spreadsheet (for the last four weeks), and was tragically disappointed at the number of empty boxes (rest days). I got irrationally angry with myself, as it is my own fault. However, there is no good in that particular thought process, so I'm attempting to be proactive. I'm investigating new solutions to help with the sleeping, and ways to prevent the Winter issues (not the least of which is Seasonal Affective Disorder, from the lack of light here in the Northeast) from effecting my workouts. Ultimately, the workouts HELP with all of these issues... it's just getting to them that can be dicey, because of these issues. Do you see the nasty loop there? Nonetheless.... after a bit of a freak-out on the (thankfully, rational and familiar with my outbursts) GT, this week, I was able to get it back together for today.

Spartaned the EFF Up, in honor of all my peeps that were getting their Mud on at the SoCal race today. I reminded myself that if that is what I truly want to do too (starting in a short 99 days), I needed to get out of my own way and get my WOD on.

To CrossFit I went... where I paid penance to the CF gods, and WOD Overlords for skipping classes recently.  Here's how today went:

Warm-Up:
- Partner Med Ball Toss (14# ball): This is always a good warm up. It's like playing catch with a buddy.... with a really heavy ball. LOL.
- 10 Inchworms with a Push Up: I hated this. Immensely. Ironically, I was wearing my "T-rex hates push-ups" shirt, as I was hating on this movement... which made me laugh and suck it up a bit. However, let me just take this moment to note HOW MUCH my arms suck. Inchworms cause you to use your arms. THEN to drop into a push up (even though I was on my knees) was near impossible. 10 was really rugged for me, and that was really frustratingly hard.
I shut up, eyes on the prize, and moved onto the WOD:
WOD, Part 1:
"FRAN" (one of the CrossFit Benchmark WODs)
21-15-9
- Thrusters (50#)
- Pull Ups (Jumping)
Time: 5:05 min.
As you can see, for part one of today's WOD, we hit my strengths and weaknesses. 50# Thrusters were okay - this is a strong movement for me, as it is mostly leg/hip. I wondered if I should use a lighter weight, but ultimately was glad I didn't, as I found 50# to be the appropriate amount of heavy for the goal of this WOD: It was supposed to be executed at Sprint Pace. You were not supposed to be lifting heavy for strength, or anything like that... but something you could sustain for 21-15-9 reps, and beast through it. This is a timed WOD, so you're supposed to go completely balls to the wall. The pull ups slowed me down a little bit, because that is one of my major weak areas... but I pushed through it and got a respectable time: 5:05. It is deceptively "fast", because of the jumping pull ups, I think. If I had been using bands, or been self-powering actual pull ups, I'm pretty sure it would've slowed me down to get through them. Nonetheless, I did the best I could do, TODAY, with what I've got to work with (t-rex arms).

I must confess, however... I was beasting through Fran, determined to really push myself to this Sprint Pace we were supposed to be aiming for (no breaks! no lolligagging! Shut up and lift!). At the end of that 5:05, I was done, walked around a few steps, then assumed the common Crossfit position. Hands on Knees, panting, trying to convince yourself that your body is *wrong*, you definitely do not have to throw up. My body was not so sure. I felt a little better knowing that the guy (approx. my age) who was going at about the same pace, and appeared to be equally pushing myself, was right next to me, in much the same stance. Iwillnotthrowup, Iwillnotthrowup.... haha... AH yes, and we call this "Fun!".

Anyway, after getting our times on the board and recovering a bit, it was on to WOD, Part 2:
5 Rounds, For Time:
10 Wall Balls (14#)
10 Ball Slams (14#)
Time: 5:07 min.

I was immensely glad that I was in the half of the class that did Fran first. Not sure I would've been able to so successfully complete Fran's Thrusters, after doing these wall balls... wall balls, in theory, should be the easier movement, but after the Fran time, my legs were shaking on my last round. Got it done though, and put a lot of ... Love... into those ball slams! haha... Enthusiasm, perhaps? There is something very gratifying about purposely slamming something repeatedly to the floor.
Finish time, 5:07. Pretty good. Above the class average for this half of the workout. I, again, credit my long-standing squat-practicing (GT, I hate it when you're so completely right.).
After all of that, I pretty much wanted to collapse into the CrossFit Starfish pose (you know, the flat on your back, sprawled out on the rubber mats, dying a little?)... However, I reminded myself that it's always better for a fighter to finish on his feet... How much more powerful do you look/feel if you're STILL on your feet after whatever you've been through, rather than collapsing to sit, or Starfish? RAWR. Still Standing.
------------------------------

Later this afternoon, I was looking out the window. It was sunny (ish) and relatively warm... like 35! (hey, this is VT in January. That's a heat wave!) and I felt like I had recovered well from CrossFit, gotten some lunch, etc... TIME for a RUN. I haven't run in too many days, and my legs needed to get out there.
I put on ONE (warmish) layer, and headed out the door. It wasn't a "fabulous" run, as my legs (as it turns out. weird!) were tired, and the traction on the sidewalks was slushy and melty in spots... but I got my miles done. Looked like this:
Time: 45:34 min
Distance: 4.04
Ave Pace: 11:16 min/mi

I have to say... I have been having too many days off. This felt ugly. Particularly so. I guess, really, the stats weren't any worse than usual... but my body was feeling this run, I'll tell ya. Lesson Learned: Stick to training plan, for a reason.

It was, however, really pleasant to not run in 50 million layers, and not freezing my ass off, or getting ice chunks frozen to my eyelashes, etc. I think running in the spring is going to be wonderful this year.
I did have an amusing experience that I'll leave you all with, tonight...
Out running... successfully avoiding the wet slushiness. I get to this one stretch of sidewalk that always has holes/puddles, etc. to be wary of. I'm carefully trotting through that area, avoiding sketchy looking spots... I turn my head, because I hear a car engine rev up, and plant one foot solidly, up to my ankle, in ICE COLD slush water. Like, water over my ankle. As I suddenly feel this burst of cold, I realize there is nothing physically I can do to stop Foot #2 from following right behind and ALSO up to my other ankle in ice water. I simply could not stop the trajectory it was on, in time. Then, I was stuck in the middle of the ankle-deep ice water lake, and simply had to just keep running through it, to get out... 4-5 more steps. Nice. Clearly, I needed to ice my feet, as I ran. It must help?
Then, because to make the 4 mile distance, I do part of my route twice, which happens to include the aforementioned piece of sidewalk, I realize I'm going to encounter this again (on mile 2 originally, then again, on mile 3.... out of 4.). As I'm coming around the corner to The Puddle, I am thinking about all my friends that our out at the Spartan Race in SoCal, crawling through the mud, etc.... and I came up on the puddle....... What did I do!?!

Just kept running. In full stride, without slowing down, and with deliberate intention, I ran right through the middle of Tiny Icy Lake, smiled to myself (hey, my feet were already wet, right?) and kept on running. WAHA. ARoO!

Having said all that, I came home and foam-rolled... and my legs are feeling a bit tuckered out at the moment... trying to decide what I'm going to do in the morning... go to CrossFit? Go Run? Double up, like I did today? hmm... just not sure.

SOMEthing, though, as I'm back with a vengeance, BlogLand. Focused and driven - "Ima show you, how great I am!"

Strong, deeply rooted desire is the starting point of all achievement. - Napoleon Hill

Spartan Shape-Up, Day 186:

Back at it this morning, BlogLand, and it felt great. Sometimes, I wonder why I get off track, as I always feel SO much better when I'm training. Dear Self, Learn this Lesson.

So, it was a CrossFit morning, today. I haven't been to CrossFit in a week or so (*sigh*), so I was a little apprehensive today was going to be evil... but as it turns out, today was going to be a Strength Day (YAY! My Favorite!).

We began with a Warm Up:
- 5 min. Jump rope: Things to ponder, to prepare for mastery of Double Unders... Try jumping slower, and letting your heel gently tap the ground each time, rather than staying on the ball of your toes. This was much harder to execute than I anticipated.
- 5 min. leg/hip stretch to prep for today's WOD: Note to self: remember these stretches. This was awesome. It was like mini-yoga, and really stretched out my hip flexors and quads, etc.
- 2 min. in full down-squat position. Ow. There's not much else to say there.
- 2 min. on the foam roller: working on the upper thoracic region of the back, to help with flexibility/tightness, allowing more upright of a back while lifting.

Then, after a little practice it was onto the WOD:

The first challenge was to complete two of the one-minute benchmark activities. I chose:
- Burpees (result: 15 in a minute)
- Sit ups (result: 25 in a minute)
My burpee number felt pretty respectable to me, but one of the other guys in the class busted out 22. Geesh. I felt like I was moving. HMM. Must continue to work on this.

Then, we got to the Strength Activity:
This was how it was set up (before I modified it):

Not for time; complete:

• 1 Thruster @ 1 rep Max weight
• 10 Thrusters @ 80% 1RM weight
• 1 Thruster @ 1RM
• 20 Thrusters @ 65% 1RM
• 1 Thruster @ 1RM
• 30 Thrusters @ 50% 1RM

 Sets of 10, 20, & 30 should be unbroken

That's not quite what ended up happening, mostly because I had no idea what my !RM was going to be, so first, Tyler (the CrossFit Instructor of the day) and I had to find that. As it turns out, I had a solid 1RM at 100#. Apparently, this is pretty good? It caused this other lady in the class to come over and ask me how long I'd been doing CF, etc. and comment on the weight. The tricky thing with a Thruster is that it is basically a front squat - which I am good at - with a Push Press - which my arms/shoulders are not as strong at. It was frustrating to feel like I could've put MORE weight on for the squat portion, but just couldn't QUITE get it over my head, without killing myself. Next time!

So, after a few minutes and 5-10 reps of trying to find that one rep max, I did. Rawr. That felt good.

Then, I backed it down to 70# and did 10 thrusters in a row. THAT may have been harder than the One Rep Max, as you must just keep going. For someone with whiny shoulders and arms (me), that is the hard part. Squats, no problem, but when you must suddenly convince your body that you're going to "explode" and throw this up over your head... there can be protests.

Back to the One Rep Max. 100# was definitely trickier this time. Did I do it? Yes. After a little break, a sip of water and a quick self-pep talk. Thankfully, I like the challenge of lifting, so I was up to this task. It did not STAY above my head for long, but it got there, my elbows locked out, there was a pause... SO, it counted.

Whew. Little break. Back to 70# (My reps are not quite as prescribed, as I didn't have the proper weights to divide them up, and I was mixing up the WOD anyway. ). 20 reps at 70#... THAT was evil. I broke this one into 2 sets of 10. You were supposed to shoot for going straight through the 20... but I was getting tired, and I know that keeping form is more important. Plus, not for nothing, but 70# was slightly heavier than prescribed. So there!

And, I loaded on the One Rep Max, again. 100#. This was REAL UGLY, by this point. I got it to the rack position (at my chest, ready to go up into a push press), and wasn't totally sure I was going to make it down the squat and up overhead. BUT, the worst that could happen was I dropped it (rubber bumpers! Yay!), so I'd at least give it a shot. Dooowwnn to squat. Check. Quick Pep talk. Up! Over head! I made it... but I must admit, I didn't quite get my arms locked over head, and I definitely dropped this bad boy - not set it down gently. So, we'll say I got half credit, here.

Finally (what a relief!), it was on to 40#, and a set of 30. Picking up that 40# felt SO LIGHT after all this. It was a beautiful thing. However, by this point, my muscles were All. Done. so 30 of these things in a row was grueling. I managed 20, then I had to give in, put the bar down and have a couple of seconds, before banging out the last 10.
It was actually my wrists that were the limiting factor. I must work on keeping them straight when the weight is over my head, etc. , to reduce the stress on them.

All in all, I was happy with today's WOD. I put some good work in, found out what my 1RM is, and got my sweat on. Now, a few hours later, I'm definitely feeling it in my shoulders.

After the work out, I was switching my shoes and the lady that commented earlier, came over to ask me about my shoes (Inov-8, for the win!). She asked me how I liked them, and I told her I loved them, though they do take a little getting used to (they're minimalist) for the sake of your legs/joints, but since she was in Vibrams, she'd probably be fine. I commented that I use them to run in, and still love them a lot. And she looked at me dubiously and was like, "Oh? You run in them? Like a couple of miles?" I was like, "No... actually, I've run up to 6 or 7 in these, and never had an issue...".... to which she replied "Oh" and raised her eyebrows at me.

I wasn't sure how to take that. Old Me chimed in her two sense about how that woman must not think a fat chick like me could possibly run 6-7 miles.... but then, I tried to remind myself that she just watched me do a respectable heavy thruster... surely she must think of me as slightly more capable "athlete" (I use the term loosely). But... Who knows. I didn't like the tone of her look at me. Bleh. I think it is just the mind-set that I've been in, lately. Still not quite out of it... but seriously, BlogLand, I swear, she gave me an "oh reallllyy..." look, like I was making that up.

Ah well... I will leave you with these words to reflect on:

"Some of the greatest battles will be fought within the silent chambers of your own soul." - E.T. Benson

"You will never do anything in this world without courage. It is the greatest quality of the mind next to honor". –Aristotle

Spartan Shape-Up, Day 175:

Wow. One Hundred and Seventy Five Days. Sometimes when I type the number, it just hits me, BlogLand. WOW. Incidentally, if you look to your right, you will also see that there is only 115 days until my first Spartan Race. I'm more than halfway there! ACK!!!! *commence freak out*

So as not to lose my mind completely, let's change the subject. Let's talk about food. As you are well aware, BlogLand, I did that "No Bread" challenge for 50 days, commencing on Christmas Eve. After that, I honestly haven't put that many carbs back into my diet. I'm still keeping things mainly proteins with fruits and veggies. Not to say that the occasional starch isn't making it in there, but honestly, my body doesn't want it the same way. I feel better. Ahhh...

ANYWAY, having said that, I need your help, dear Readers.
Sherry Post, over at Simple Fuel, is having a contest. She issued a challenge (everyone knows I love a good challenge), and the winner gets a whole bunch of this amazing Simple Fuel of hers - which I am positively dying to try. I've been seeking out some new ways of fueling for/recovering from these crazy workouts I've been doing and I like the idea of her products - Simple. "All Natural Body Food". It's not some weird powdery mix of chemical things, with long names I can't pronounce... It's made from different kinds of berries, seeds, coconut milk, etc.. She's got granola (which I hear is crazy addictive), as well as meal replacer/supplemental drinks, natural snacks.... Hell, just go take a look.
But WAIT. Contest. I would like to win the Granola (Om Nom Nom. Carbs I don't have to feel bad about...).
Could you kindly head over to Simple Fuel's FaceBook Page, "LIKE" it, then leave a quick comment telling them I sent you? You may feel free to profess your undying love for me for introducing you to those products, or pledge your allegiance to me due to your new super powers from eating The Granola, or whatever you'd like (lol). But to recap:
1) Visit Simple Fuel
2) "Like" the page
3) Comment and tell them Aja sent you.

Please. Thank You.

Now, onto our regularly scheduled programming:

Today was technically CrossFit day. (Yep, it's Wednesday again.) However, I have been struggling to get back on my normal work/sleep/workout/life in general schedule, after the holidays... It is just not all back together yet. I've been going to bed way too late, sleeping too late, rushing to work (so I'm not late), then having to workout when I get home (which is late)... are we sensing a trend? In short, no excuses, I just need to get back into the swing of things.

This morning, though, didn't go so well. I was up late last night, but dutifully checked my alarm to make sure it was set for CrossFit wake-up time (6am. Ugh.). It was. I went to bed and was out immediately. Apparently, when the alarm went off at 6am, I woke up just enough to snooze it... and wake up a couple hours later. After my CF class was over. WTF. Damn. Alright, well, apparently I needed it. So, off to work I went.

So, consulting the GT (confessing my transgressions keeps me honest) for the best alternate plan for when I got home from work, and I was assigned the CrossFit Murph. I died inside. I know what Murph is... It is:
1 mile run
100 pull ups
200 push ups
300 squats
1 mile run
.... for time.

I didn't think about keeping time, but I knew I wouldn't be able to bust out this whole WOD tonight (I didn't even get home until 8pm, it's a legit reason!), so I split it up a bit.
I got my shoes on and went out for a run:
Time: 20:44 min
Distance: 2.0 miles
Average Pace: 10.22 min/miles
Which included a stop at a crosswalk. SO, I'm thinking I did those two miles solidly at a 10 min pace. THAT, BlogLand, is good for me. Speed is not something I've typically had a lot of, or could sustain... so, I was thrilled to see that pace on the clock. (I've got a flat 5K coming up in February, and I'm not going to lie... I'm hoping for about a 30 min pace...)

Upon arriving home, I resolved to do HALF the rest of the Murph, and finish the other half tomorrow morning. It's just not good for my sleeping if I get all my adrenaline rolling at 10pm. So:
50 Pull Ups (owwwww)
100 Push Ups (OWWWW)
150 Squats (ehh, not too bad).

I'm feeling this in my back and shoulders at the moment... sooo... it could be interesting when I try and finish the other half in the morning, but I suppose this is the penance one pays when one sleeps through their alarm.... (Lesson #4568 Learned. Check.)

So, in the midst of getting a little mouthy on FB about getting ready to do (a 1/2) Murph this evening, I find myself committed to another challenge:

1/2 Mile of Lunges, on Sunday, January 8th. Apparently, it's group challenge, through a little virtual connecting. Through the magic of cell phones/Skype and whathaveyou, The GT and I, as well as one of our fellow Spartans will all be lunging together. For a 1/2 mile.

I'm not sure what my big mouth may have gotten me into this time, and suddenly 1/2 mile seems like a LONG way for lunges, but hey, I'm game. STFU, right?

Readers, are any of you up for the challenge? How about 1/4 mile of lunges? Maybe lunges while viewing a scenic vista? Lunges while carrying something heavy? Lunges while making silly faces? Lunges. Just do some Lunges on Sunday, in solidarity for the fact I probably won't be able to walk on Monday, okay? If you get your Lunge on, how about sending me some pics? We'll compare lunges on Sunday night, alright?

Spartan up, and give it your best shot...

In the meantime, get to bed. Geesh. Don't you know that an appropriate amount of sleep is vital to your health and wellness? hehe... Oh My. (She says as she finishes blogging at 12:30am.).

"Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined." -Henry David Thoreau

Spartan Shape-Up, Day 166:

I would like to start this post with an OW. Just, a big, whiny OW.

Remember that Crossfit WOD I posted a couple of days ago, that included the 100 sit-up "After Party"? Yeah. Apparently, I am experiencing an acute bout of DOMS that is currently making my life hell. I bet you had no idea that your abs could cry. Sob, even. I assure you, mine are (particularly that little top set. Those even hurt to touch. Ow.).

However. It was a CF day again, and as part of my 2012 promises to myself... No Excuses. Pain is temporary, and I probably wasn't going to die. So. To CF I went... praying there would be no big ab workout, admittedly.

The Warm Up looked like this:
3x:
15 KB swings
10 Squats
10 Hollow Rocks (some sort of weird gymnastic move, that happens to be ab-centric. Ow.)

Then, we did 3 "Benchmark" things. Basically, do the best you can, on this day. It is recorded in our binders, thus allowing you to track your progress. There are like 20 "Benchmarks" but today, we did three:
500m Ski, took me: 2:15 min.
1 Minute Box Jumps (16" box): 24
1 Minute Squats: 46

Ooooo boy. I knew I wasn't going to be good for things like push ups or pull ups today, so I thought box jumps and squats could be something I could bust out. When you throw caution to the wind and don't "pace yourself", but just go all out for a minute, it can be quite exhausting. I was annoyed I couldn't get more box jumps in... but I'm not yet comfortable jumping down from the box... I jump up, step down. Jump up... step down. I see myself losing a lot of time that way. However, then, I moved on to squats. OWNed that. That is one squat per every 1.30 seconds. I did start to slow a bit toward the end, too... soooo... a solid benchmark, I think. Next time... 55 in 60 seconds sounds good, right?

Anyway, then we were onto today's WOD:
7 rounds, for time:
9 Deadlifts
6 Power Hang Cleans
3 Front Squats
Completed in: 7:33 min.

So, here's the tricky part about this. I could dead lift the weight of a person. I could front squat a sizeable amount, too... BUT, you must do them in succession. (A deadlift brings the bar to your waist, then waist to shoulders is the Hang Clean, then On shoulders, down to squats... it is a good progression).  This is where it got tricky for me.... What would my weight be?? I ended up going for 50#, because I had no idea and the prescribed weight for women was 95#. I figured 50 was a decent compromise, particularly knowing that physically I could deadlift that easily and squat it without issue.
And the clock started. First three rounds, I was a machine. Tonight's instructor even commented that next time, I should go up more weight, as I was making it look too easy. Rawr.  Rounds 4 and 5 got a little tricky... I can see that the Power Hang Clean is my weakness, of the three. That is the maneuver that I got tired on.   6 of those in a row, by round 6 and 7 were UGLY. Could I do them? Yes. Did I do them? Yes. Did I find a weakness? Most definitely. And by weakness, I mean place to improve... hehe

However, I finished in a very respectable 7:33min, using a weight that was higher than average for a lot of the women, and was still in good shape at the end. Again, I sing the praises of doing a lot of squat-training before starting CrossFit!!

After that good time, we were on to the "After Party!"... You know, the stuff you add in, "just for fun"... today, it was 30 pull ups. For me, it was 30 jumping pull ups. Funny, I did notice today that I'm getting stronger at those - the negative portion (the down) I am feeling more in control of, and I am tiring less quickly. WELL on my way to one pull up by July! Woot!

And now... I'm off to crawl into the comfort of my bed, as tomorrow is REST DAY! Usually, I'm not so excited about Rest Day, but my body is TIRED today. I'm sore in my abs, my shoulders are sore, and my legs are definitely tired. Tomorrow, we give everyone a break, making sure to eat well, drink a bunch of water and stretch... and maybe roll on some PVC when I get home! Ah, the life.

Part 2: Greetings and Goals, 2012

Spartan Shape-Up, Day 165:

Another big post today, BlogLand. Yesterday, it was all about owning your learning experiences and leaving behind the "junk" in 2011. Today (Happy New Year!), is a fresh beginning. There's a lot to be done, this year.

But first, as always, down to the daily business.

It was Long Run Day. Yep. New Year's Day, after getting my Party on last night (I'm almost 30, I'll admit it, I don't recover *quite* as fast as I did when I was 21...). I realized I faced a choice: I could put my comfy clothes on, curl up, nap the dreary gray day away and "recover", or I could get out there and set the precedent for this Epic Year to come. And it will be epic, BlogLand. Epic of Biblical proportions, I tell you. I refused to kick that off napping and skipping a run.

Soo.... I figured out how to make it work. (Here's the lesson, people!) I prioritized the run, and what I needed to do to be able to do that. Step one, HYDRATE. haha... Had to recover from the previous evenings shenanigans. Step two, fuel the body... and no, leftover buffalo chicken dip, or a stop at McDonalds - despite how awesome that felt like it would've tasted at that moment - was not going to be adequate fuel. Step three (so crucial), take a wee nap. I was tired, I admit it. The nap had to happen - but not all day. Got in my bed, set the alarm and capitalized on re-energizing time with my pillow.

Alarm went off. This was the deciding moment. It would've felt good to stay in that warm bed. But (as I reminded myself), you know what else feels good? Knowing I stuck to my goals/plans, getting to the end of a run, seeing the weight loss after some consistent workouts. So, I shut up my whiny self, laced up my sneakers and got out to run around in the unseasonably warm (40 degrees!) January weather.

Here's what today's run looked like:
Time: 1:14:47min 
Distance: 6.02 mi
Average Pace: 12:25 min/mi

Hello Long Run Day, and a New Distance PR!! Yep,  I ran all 6.02 miles, straight through, minus the unavoidable stop for one big crosswalk. Now, granted, it was pretty slow. I probably could've done it faster. Sub-12 minute miles, I think... but, in all honesty, I was tired, still recovering, and pushing for the distance - not the time. I was pretty excited with myself that I was committed to getting that distance, even though I wasn't at 100% functioning.

It was a decent run though. The weather, while feeling damp and gray, was a good temperature. Everything was wet and puddley on the sidewalks, so I had a mini obstacle run... jumping puddles and lingering ice patches... right until I miscalculated and planted my foot squarely in the middle of one. Nice. 3+ miles to go, with wet socks. AH WELL. I guess it's just preparation for running in the mud...

The GT and I are in discussions about some better fueling/recovery techniques. At this point, when I get home from a run, more often than not, I'm ready to eat a horse and am feeling pretty spent. Pushing to that 6 mile mark (from a longest distance of 5!) was an exertion for me, for sure. I was tired. As I said to the GT, as I ask my body to perform more above and beyond, it may need more from me to accommodate. More things to learn!

Speaking of learning, I would like to note that I learned that yesterday's 100 sit ups in CF makes my abs VERY, very angry. Core muscles are not fun to be sore in, as you can't just not use them. Ouch. I'm hurting!

Onto the big stuff:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

So, as much as we discussed things I was leaving behind in 2012, I wanted to take a look at what I am going to make of 2012.
I think it is important to pause and take a look at the verbiage, too, there. I emphasize "what I am going to make of 2012," as that is a key concept. I have learned that nothing will just happen if you wait for it to happen. There is no better day than this day, no better moment than this moment... Chase down your dreams and beat them into submission, one step at a time. You'll often see me refer to STFU (Spartan'ing the eff up!), as it really states this concept for me. Spartan up - Make Goals, Get Tough, Make them Happen.

"Big Goals" for 2012:
- Continue to bring Positivity into my life, and leave the Negativity. People, Places, Thoughts, Plans, all subject to this rule.
- Run a 10K
- Finish the Spartan Trifecta (Sprint, Super, Beast)
- Find a healthy weight for me... approximately down another 35-40 pounds.
- Forget the fears, and "have a little faith." Who says I can't do a rope climb, or thinks I will be the last one across the finish line? Not me, not this year.

Medium Goals:
- Follow training plan. Get it done. No excuses.
- Complete Blog/Log/food journal, daily.
- Continue focusing on eating well. Low carb, more protein and veg.
- Fix the sleep schedule. Insomnia is not good for health.

Daily/Small Goals:
- Some pull up work, every day. One, unassisted, pull up by my Birthday (July 6th).
- One step forward every day, no matter how small. Even tiny steps (like only 10 pull ups, or a mile run) help to keep your head in the game when the going gets tough.
- Own ME. I am what I am. This is the body I have, and it is strong and beautiful - even if I am not a size 2. I also am competitive, emotional and mouthy. Love it, or get out of the way.

These are my health and fitness goals... but they transfer over to many areas of my life, I find. The more I "own me" and let go of the fears, or the person that I used to be, I am learning I CAN do anything. That brings something entirely different to a person's aura. I feel more confident, happier, successful... and with that, only seems to come more confidence, happiness and success. I can not WAIT to take my 30th birthday picture, having become the person that I wanted to be at 30... not the person that life would beat me into.

Dear 2012. Watch out. I'm coming.

“The simplest things are often the truest.” - Richard Bach

Spartan Shape-Up, Day 161:

It's a crazy winter ice storm here in VT, BlogLand. THAT certainly killed my run plans for today. Working all kinds of overtime at work, and the winter darkness has really trashed my schedule. It's screwing with my sleep, forcing me to go to different CrossFit classes (and I'm sorry, I tried... I can NOT be at the gym at 6am.), and generally mucking up the situation. Soon it will all even out... but until then, I am finding myself in a jam, sometimes, with workouts.
What do you do when you get home from work at 7:40pm, have dinner, and still haven't WOD'd yet?
You make an off-hand comment to the GT about the ice-storm killing your run-plans.... and Boom. You find yourself getting assigned a modified Crossfit Cindy:
It's a 20 Min. AMRAP:
5 Pull-Ups (although, since I don't have a bar, I was assigned squat thrusts to sub in, instead)
10 Push Ups (on my knees)
15 Air Squats
So, I am proud to say, I successfully managed 13 rounds.
Unfortunately, my t-rex arms are still the limiting factor. I can bust out and beast through squats and such, but push-ups really test me. I was hoping to hit 15 rounds, but those damn push ups gave me a run for my money... during the last few rounds, I definitely had to take breaks to get through 10 at a time (you know, the patented "down dog" position... lol). Ugh. I find that frustrating, but one thing at a time... the upper body stuff is currently my Achilles heel to be conquered.

In other news, I don't have too much to report... I did have a positive realization over the holidays, though. Every single holiday to date, I've played the "OMFG, I have nothing to wear, I look HORRIBLE" and just generally surviving them, always feeling a bit ashamed of how I looked. This year, I looked in the mirror and was not horrified (big step) and saw something positive - I saw all the early morning runs, the sweat puddles at CrossFit, the 50 days of  "No Bread" and the endless days of aching hamstrings. This is what I saw:

L: 284#.... R: 209 (ish) #

It was weird, I shared this on FB, and one comment in particular hit home with me (I'm paraphrasing): You went from Sad to Sassy!

... which was SO TRUE. SO true. I still have a LONG way to go, a lot of muscle to build, etc. but I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I AM happier. Finally the person I really am inside is less and less stifled by my physical capabilities. Along with that, I'm learning that there is almost NOTHING I can't do, if I try. I am more capable than I ever imagined. I know that all sounds cliche, but it is the absolute truth. I never imagined, in my wildest dreams, that I would find myself at this place. I FEEL GOOD. Healthy. Strong. Confident. 

This is no to be shameless self-promotion, but I believe it is important to take stock in the milestones in your journey. I am still not satisfied with what I see in the mirror, but I have to acknowledge the fact that now, more often, I can see the progress.   Some days, now, I even see "pretty". THAT, BlogLand, is huge. It has been a very long time (if ever) that I was proud of what I looked like. Now, I love when people ask me about what I'm doing... I talk to them about training, about Spartan Race, about the craziness that I'm up to. I LOVE the look on their face when they are in absolute shock... 

Let me tell you BlogLand, it's not a lie... it CAN be done. If I can go from sad, unhealthy, inactive, depressed and surrounded by negatives in my life.... to (more) fit, eating well, running significant mileage, lifting heavy things, feeling (mostly!) positive and changing my surroundings to the positive things in life.... YOU can do this too. 

Just take One day at a time. Just ONE. Take each Hour or each minute, if you need to. 

Tomorrow, I am going to........

For me, my tomorrow plan is to get up and check out the weather... HOPEfully, I'll be able to get a morning run in. If only my calves (which are currently compressed in my hot pink calf sleeves!) would chill out, all would be well. 

Now, to rest. Back at Living out Loud in the morning... 

"Great hopes make great men." - Thomas Fuller

Spartan Shape-Up, Day 157, 158 & 159:

Dear BlogLand... I'm sorry, I have totally been slacking on the Blog-time. The holidays have been... a tumultuous time. However. On to the WOD's... no need to dwell on the craziness.

Day 157, Saturday, Christmas Eve:
It was a run day, and I was determined to make time for it, despite it being Christmas eve.
It looked like this:
Time: 38:18 minutes
Distance 3.69 miles
Ave 10:22 min/miles
I think imapmyrun is a little off there, somehow... as in, I think the GPS screwed up my mileage a little (which would make my average a little skewed...)... but. WHATEVER. The important thing is that I got out and run. And was pretty effing cold. I swear, BlogLand, I really *need* some official winter running gear. Up to this point, it's been pretty mild running, and I've gotten by with some creative layering... but, I'm starting to feel like that's not going to be the case, in another few weeks, and I have some lofty goals to stick to.
Seriously. I *need* to find some money in the budget for these things. Yikes. BRR.

Day 158, Sunday, Christmas Day:

I had big intentions for this day. I did. It was going to be a long-run day. I was up early, I was planning on it... I had worked it into cooking time and everything.... but then I looked outside. It was single digits (pre wind chill), windy and precipitating various forms of snow/sleet/rain.... I then evaluated my (non-existent) winter running wardrobe, and found it seriously lacking. Like, not in the just buck up and deal with it sort of way... but, I would've been seriously cold, in the absence of appropriate gear. Up to this point, winter has been really pleasant, but it seems to be coming back with a vengeance.
Sooooo.... No run. I probably should've done a little something inside as a WOD... but, I decided that surviving my family was going to be exhausting enough.

Day 159, Monday:

And now we make it to Crossfit Day! Again, we had a holiday off from work, so I was going to try and get in that long run... but the weather is really an issue. I think this week, with the paycheck, I'm going to have to "make" there be a little extra money for some winter running tights, to start.

However, I DID make it to Crossfit tonight, with a lot of pent up (not-so-positive) energy, ready to crush the workout.
What was really cool is that there were only two of us in the class tonight, so it was like a personal training session!
It went like this:

Warm Up: 3 Rounds Of.......

• Ski 250 M
• 10 Wall Balls (yes, thank you, I DO have excellent Wall-Balls!)
• 10 Burpees

Strength/Skill:

• Deadlift: 5-5-5-5 @ 70%, 1 RM

So, I've never really worked towards a 1 rep max, yet, at this point... SO, since we had such a small group, tonight's instructor decided we should see where I was at, in that capacity. I enjoy this particular instructor, as he is less.... cautious... than the others. I did a few light, to make sure my form was in a good place, and then we piled on the weight. THAT was exactly what I needed tonight. Somewhere to put my energy. Let me just say, I hit an excellent PR for the evening.... Not sure I could do that on any other day, or if I could do it regularly... but I DID it. It's amazing where emotions will get you. Channel them into something good.

Then, we did the WOD:

• Max Box Jumps, 5 Min. (16" box) (76, total, I think...)
• Max Pull-Ups, 4 Min. (jumping pull ups, for me) (somewhere between 60-70, ish...)
• Max Double-Unders, 3 Min. (singles, for me, divided by 3) (270=90)
• Max Push-Ups, 2 Min. (knees) (not a lot... 25-30ish?)
• Max Ring Rows, 1 Min. (another 30ish maybe?)

* Record total reps: 357!!!

Soo.... I did good. I pushed. HARD. Shannon (the giant 6'4" CF instructor guy), I think caught on to where I was at tonight, and was after me anytime I started to slow down. Military style - Are you DONE? You're not GIVING UP, are YOU? JUMP! JUMP! PULL.... 10 more SECONDS. DO IT. 

I know it sounds ridiculous, but I work well with that sort of motivation. Telling me I can't, or daring me to is extremely motivating. 

The box jumps I handled well... I aimed to keep a good steady rhythm, for the whole 5 minutes. Success!

Pull ups... WELL. I worked at those. I did jumping pull ups... which was pretty challenging, after doing 5 minutes of box jumps.... Plyo is my nemesis, but I got it done. I feel like I made a respectable number of them, too. We'll see how my shoulders are feeling tomorrow!

Jump rope is a comfortable, known quantity for me. I can bust that out pretty well. Again, MORE PLYO, though... WHEW. 

Then we got to the real evil time...Push ups, which I find grueling on the best of days. That slowed me down, for sure. Uuuugghhh... It was really when Shannon started reminding me to go ALL the way to the floor, that I knew I was in trouble. OUCH. *insert quivering arms*

Although, then, we ended with a lovely set of Ring Rows. I can do anything for a minute. Rawr. And ring rows aren't that bad, thankfully.

 Finally, we got to the:After-Party: (because my arms weren't shot yet!!)
15 Toes2Bar .....


Yeahhh.... about that. I gave it a good go, I swear I did. I got my knees to my elbows several of the times. I just don't QUITE have that kind of strength. Particularly after a whole bunch of other stuff. 
I made a valiant effort though.... 


THAT said... it's time for bed. I'm supposed to be up early for a run tomorrow, and I'm already up WAY TOO LATE. 


Tomorrow's run goal: 3.75 - 4 miles. I may have to make a couple of extra loops around town for that, but I officially have to add more mileage, per the GT. 


He is apparently convinced that I will be running 10 miles, in somewhere around 3 weeks. ....... and he hasn't been wrong yet... sooo..... Here goes nothing.... (PLEASE let it not be too cold in the morning!)

“The person who gets the farthest is generally the one who is willing to do and dare. The sure-thing boat never gets far from shore.”

Spartan Shape-Up, Day 151:

Good Afternoon, BlogLand! Despite the extreme craziness of this holiday season, it was a good day. It was Long Run Day. Yep, the official plan for LRD is to get out there and run more than my usual 3ish miles. 


I didn't run yesterday, as I was overtaken by holiday craziness... so I was determined to go today. Plus, when I got up and looked out the window, it looked like a pleasant, sunny day. ... Right until I looked at the thermometer. A balmy 15 degrees. High of 20 today, supposedly. Not to be deterred, I reminded myself that people DO run outside in the winter, without turning into popsicles, and I would warm up if I got moving. I put on a bunch of layers (Seriously, Santa, I need Under Armour Cold Gear. PLEASE? I've been GOOD!), laced up the sneakers and got in the car. I was smart enough, though, to bring a super warm sweatshirt for post-run, cold sweaty me. 


I was cold, already. This does not bode well, I thought to myself. It was noon and I could see my breath, my car was angry about moving, and I was going to go RUN?! A LONG RUN?! WTF. 


And then I remembered. Several of my Spartan homies (Remember Guest GT, Todd? and Margo the Great? to name just a couple!) were in NJ, competing in the World's Toughest Mudder Competition. While I do not yet know all the details, I know that it was COLD there, and it involved them doing laps of the course (swimming it wetsuits, obstacles, etc.), for more than 24 hours. Apparently, several times they had to break the ice to get through the obstacles. Many people pulled out for hypothermia, or close to it. Margo and Todd did 30+ hours of that. Despite my badassness not even being CLOSE to theirs (yet!), surely I could handle ONE HOUR outside, in dry clothes, right? 


Yes. The only answer was yes. 


So, I STFU and drove to my Long Run spot. It's an indefinitely long out and back... which is good, because then I feel like I have no choice but to run back, however far I run out... because I have to get back to my car and all. haha... 


I got out of the car, shivered in the cold breeze (Oh yeah, I was running next to a large, frozen body of water... there was a cold breeze!), walked over to my starting line, started the tracker and I was off. I've elected to go without music the last few times, as it seems to help me pay a little better attention to the technicality of my running; I pay more attention to my breathing, how my feet are falling, my strides, etc. Plus, it conserves the battery on my stupid old phone (new one this week! ee!), so it doesn't die halfway into my run....


So, I ran. The first mile was COLD. My muscles were not warm, I was not warm, the wind was not warm... I was like, WHY am I here?.... and then I saw another runner. Cue my competitive streak. Clearly, if THEY could do this, so could I. I was feeling really badass, right about a mile and a half in, when I realize that the icy wind was making my eyes water..... which was then promptly freezing to my face. Yes, folks, I had frozen tear-cicles on my face. AWESOME. You're sad you didn't go running today, now aren't you?


I kept running, my legs started to loosen up a bit and I warmed up... I even stuck my hands actually OUT of the sleeves I had them balled up inside of! Running down a sunny stretch of road wasn't all that bad, for the most part... I was sweating, breathing pretty evenly, and all was well.


... and then I hit the shade, around mile 2. Still running. Only in the shade, with the wind, I swear it was 10 degrees colder. I could feel the outsides of my legs, and my butt go a little cold (the numbness didn't come until later...), and decided that hey, no big deal... if they went numb, then it wouldn't hurt so much later? No different than sitting in an ice bath!!


Back into the sun I ran, and I was starting to feel a little tired. I ran and shook out my arms, to try and release the inadvertent shoulder tension that I was building up.... Shake arms, concentrate on breathing, turn over my feet. Just. Keep. Moving.

You see, BlogLand, I had a goal today. Must run an entire 3 miles with no break. Absolutely. Then, the goal would be to see how far I could go past that 3 miles, without a break. I had no idea where that would be.

At around 2 and a half miles, I trotted a U-turn in the road, and began my trek back. Still running. Okay, I was feeling like I was on track. I was not a speed demon, but I was chugging along steadily. I looked at the scenic VT dirt road stretched out in front of me and had a sudden realization: The damn road is a slight rolling incline from here, as far as my eye could see. I'd never noticed that before (see what happens when you go without music?). But, I was working for a long, non-stop run, and refused to be deterred by tiny rolling hills!

At mile 3.5ish, I was back in the shade. My neck was cold (yes. I need a scarf or something, I've determined), but I was warm with the exertion. My legs were warm in the big muscles, but the outside were pretty damn cold. It was also at this point I noticed the most fabulous part - running in the shade, with the wind, being really sweaty, had caused the sweat to form tiny ice beads on all the tiny hairs on my face. Yep, I had a tiny shield of sweat-ice-beads all over my face.

At that realization, I decided I was not going to stop running. Partially because a) I'd come this far, and damnit, 5 miles sounded a lot better than 4.25 or something... and b) if I stopped running now and had to walk the rest of the way back to the car, it was going to be really, really cold.

Still running.

By running, I mean, after I passed the 4 mile mark (feeling pretty awesome, at that, because I still hadn't stopped for a break!), I was pushing. Digging really deep and keeping my eye on the prize. I could do 5 miles. All I had to do was keep my legs moving. They were strong (I thought of the awesome squats I can do at Crossfit!), they'd been conditioned (I thought of all the time I'd put pounding the pavement from the summer time)... 5 miles was nothing. I just had to keep. moving. I found myself counting to ten, with my foot falls. Get to ten, then the next ten. I paid close attention to my breathing, remembering the GT's words that I would tire more quickly if I didn't get enough oxygen to my muscles.

The last mile was a bit zombie-like. I was tired. I was cold. All my head was thinking was 1,2,3, DEEEP BREATH.......4,5,6, BREAAAAATHE.....7, 8, 9, 10. AGAIN. 1, 2, 3.... and so on.

Then I had a little bit of a tiny epiphany. I had successfully run (thus far) more than 4 miles without stopping. I assessed my physical state. I still had more gas in the tank. I was doing it. Feeling a bit more uplifted by that thought, and a few quick thoughts of the wind-free car I could get in, and the giant warm sweatshirt that awaited me, I picked up the pace a little bit. I was in the homestretch.

The evil part about the homestretch is that in the particular way that I ran the route, I have to run BY my (nice, warm...) car for a quarter of a mile, before turning back to it. But, run I did. WAHA. STILL running. I admit, at this point, I had the phone out and was checking the mileage every few minutes, to watch for when it it 5 miles.

As I checked it the last time, I saw 5.04 on the tracker. YES. Trotted down to a walk. Ahhhhh..... My first walk in almost an hour. Felt nice. Stretched out my legs at a walk, and was recovering and walking back to the card. AND FREEZING. Shortly after you stop running, your body isn't quite as warm. But you're wet and sweaty. And Cold. I couldn't get back to the car fast enough. I jogged a little bit to get there.

Sitting in the car, warming up (it, and me!) and sipping some water, I texted the GT with the good news. My first long run that was a smashing success. It looked like this:

Summary	00:55:21	5.0 mi	11:00
Split	Time	Distance	Pace (avg)
1	00:10:08	1.0 mi	10:11
2	00:10:55	1.0 mi	10:54
3	00:11:32	1.0 mi	11:31
4	00:11:08	1.0 mi	11:07
5	00:10:56	1.0 mi	10:58
6	00:00:29	0.1 mi	10:11

Not bad, if I do say so myself. I averaged an exactly 11 min/mi, with the majority of my miles faster than that (it was that damn mile three that got really cold and tiring, that blew the average!). That is a HUGE accomplishment. Typically, on these long runs, I'd be lucky to get around an 11:40min/mi. average. YEEHAW.

The 11 min/mile average wasn't the big victory though... There was NO WALKING. I RAN FIVE MILES.

Holy shit.

Now, to keep it real, at the end of those 5 miles, I'm not sure I had a lot left in me. I might've gotten to 6 miles, but it would've not been pretty, and I would've been really drained. But that is inconsequential - for the first time, I really feel like maybe I'll be able to handle these Spartan Races and what not after all.

It seems like last weeks' 5K was a real game-changer. I'm not sure if it was the mental wall destruction, or it just happened at about the same time that my body decided to jump on board with everything. For months it's felt like I was just pushing hard and unsuccessfully at a physical wall that I just couldn't get past. Somewhere around last week, that went away. On my runs, I haven't walked at all... and today, I ran a consecutive 5 miles. My legs didn't feel heavy. Sure, they were tired, but they kept going. My body felt better about today's freakin' cold run, than it did about a nice, pleasantly warm one a few weeks ago. I barely got through a mile without walking. Yeah, remember that one? Tears and all. I do.

This is where I take a moment to say, Dear Body. THANK you for finally jumping on the bandwagon. My Workouts - particularly my runs - are so much more do-able when you decide to cooperate. It's almost like you're actually improving!!

The other component here, that I'm happy to report, is that the weight-loss is going well. I'm down another couple of pounds as of the morning, thanks to No Bread. I weighed in at 211 this morning (I still hate saying that.). That is officially 74 pounds down from my starting weight over a year ago. Rawr. I can't help but wonder if the weight-reduction is playing a factor in my success. Like, maybe because my body has to move less mass, it's working more efficiently, etc?

So, overall, the GT is pleased with today's outcome (I fear the new-improved, adapted training plan that may come of this...), and I'm thrilled out of my mind. FIVE MILES. Yep.

The best part of the day, however, was definitely the subsequent LONG. HOT. SHOWER. Me and my shivering self were reallllllyyyy glad for it. My knees are feeling a little stiff (no cartilage. Grr.), but a couple of ice packs and a wee nap seem to have rectified that. All is well. AND I RAN FIVE MILES.

That said. It's bedtime. Crossfit comes early in the morning...