Sunday, October 30, 2011
Impossible is a word to be found only in the dictionary of fools. – Napoleon Bonaparte
It is a momentous occasion today, BlogLand. Today, roughly 100 days after I decided I was going to learn to run, I crossed the finish line of my first 5K Race.
.... Wow.
Yep. Just wow. From someone who was pretty sure that she'd never be able to run, couldn't run, cringed at the very thought of running - this is a damn big deal. Here's how it went down.
It began yesterday. As you may have read on yesterday's post, I was decidedly trying to psych myself up, rather that psych myself out. Despite trying to turn on my rational brain and think through these concerns logically, I kept drifting back to the "What Ifs" and general anxiety about a situation of unknown proportions, that I barely felt like I belonged in. I was definitely slipping back to the - "I'm not a runner!" the ever popular, "I'm going to be the fat chick in the back, huffing and puffing!" , the classic "Did I train hard enough??" and everyone's favorite, "I'm going to look ridiculous, and everyone is going to be thinking - 'Why is SHE here?'" Nonetheless, and armed with the knowledge that I would have a wonderful buddy to run with, I tried to quiet my brain and get some sleep.
Yeah. Right. I'm riddled with Insomnia on a good day. Keyed up, nervous/excited me stood no chance. I tossed. I turned. I wanted so badly for this race to go well, that I was freaking myself out about everything that could possibly go wrong. Which, as you can guess, is highly counter productive. *sigh*
My alarm went off at 6:00am sharp, for Race Day. There are infrequent occasions that cause me to not hit snooze (not even ONCE!!), and get right out of bed. Today, was one of them. My body was immediately like - ZOMG!!! It's TODAY!!!!. (Oh, is this where I mention that I have a raging competitive streak, and I find competitive situations pretty motivating?). Hopping out of bed, I went through the motions of getting ready... ate a good breakfast (oatmeal with nuts, om nom nom!), drank some more water, and took a hot shower - half for the purpose of waking up, and half as a calming moment.
Over breakfast I had been checking out Facebook, and trying to absorb all the positivity that the Spartan Chicks, and some other FB friends had left me in the over night. I was transitioning into "get down to business mode", and feeling calmer, as a result. I pulled on my spiffy new running gear - a super comfy pair of compression pants, and a couple layers of wicking stuff on top - and I almost felt like I might have this experience under control. Ish.
Word of advice to any newbies to this process. NEVER look in the mirror once you have put your Spandex-ish clothing on. Acknowledge that you are extremely comfortable, your range of motion is not limited, and you'll be warm/dry due to its drying abilities.... but (are you listening?!) do NOT expect to look in the mirror and be totally psyched about what you see. Why? Because Spandex means you're going to see EVERYTHING. Every tiny bump and bulge and insecurity you have will be carefully hugged by unforgiving, probably slightly shiny, fabric. I suggest (from this morning's personal experience), to take a moment pre-spandex suiting up, to remind yourself how far you've come, the awesomeness of what you're about to do, and how cool is is that you have a *reason* to don Spandex (other than a random 80's party). You are a total Radtacular Beast. Tell yourself this repeatedly, THEN put on your Spandex like a total bad-ass. I really feel like this is key, going forward. Why? Well, after this self talk of Radness and badassery, spandex looks slightly less clingy, your muscles look just a little bit more bulging, and I swear, that particularly jiggly part you hyper-focus on (yes. That one. And that one.) temporarily disappears ... so THEN, when you check out your Race-Ready Look in the mirror that one last time, you'll be able to see your past victories (no matter how small), your present cool factor, and your upcoming triumphs - rather than how your thighs look like giant redwoods (So not true.).
That said, and successfully clad in my spiffy duds, I set out to pick up my last-minute running buddy, Lisa. Let's just start by saying how awesome Lisa is. Later, you'll know why.
We hit Race Central, and suddenly I get restless. There are RUNNERS HERE. Like, real, live, proficient looking people. In gear. With numbers on. Doing weird runner things, like eating power bars and stretching and just standing there looking athletic. I felt alien. I was starting to feel unsure and out of place... and my phone dinged. I swear, my GT is psychic at times; I found a text message with *exactly* what I needed to hear at that moment. I rallied my confidence, remembered that I could run a damn 3 mile distance, and marched over to registration. Bib #173 was ready to kill it, today.
There was a little more mill-around time, in which Lisa and I chatted with another friend of mine, Anna, who happened to be running. It was pretty much the last I saw of Anna, before she cruised off the starting line and left us, and most of everyone else in the dust (YAY! Impressive go today!!). I told her she was going to be my inspiration to keep pushing, as I would CLEARLY need to chase her down.
Then, there was an official voice... and a herding toward the starting line. People jockeyed for positions. I opted for some open space at the back... following some good veteran advice, I was trying to remind myself to NOT get caught up in the initial exuberance and start energy... particularly to not get sucked into gassing myself out at the beginning by getting going too fast out of the gate. The energy was infectious though. People were talking to each other excitedly, last minute clothing adjustments, shifting their weight and warming up (although, this could've been attributed to the fact that it was a positively *balmy* 32 degrees on the starting line, with a frost on the grass...).
... And we were off. It felt good to be moving and have somewhere to channel the pent up energy. Time to really focus and just do what I knew how to do - put one foot in front of the other, for 3 miles. I was feeling good, foot was feeling good, and the initial start felt good.... then, we saw the arrow that pointed us to Cliff Street. There is nothing like being at your first 5K, being like 2 minutes into it, and seeing that you must run up a long, solid 45-50ish degree incline. An excellent piece of advice was given to me at this point, by Super Lisa: Don't look at the hill. Look down at the road in front of you, or the runners feet in front of you.... steady pace, and just keep chugging. Why? because then you never get into the "OMG! This hill is SO BIG. I'm NEVER going to be able to do this!" or the like.
That first hill was a turning point for me. About half way up it, a funny thing started happening..... I started passing people. Quite a few people. Even people that looked "fit" and "prepared" to me (Yes, Ladies, there was mad Chicking going on, at this point. Dudes left in my dust on a uphill. "BOOM!" as MScan Spartan would say.)
That was just what I needed. Maybe I could do this. Maybe I did belong here, maybe I just was prepared... because HELL, I was RUNNING, up a HILL, at a steady pace, where other people had already dropped down to a walk, or that I'm-trying-not-to-walk-but-I-really-want-to trot.
The rest of the race was a bit of a blur... My Dad kept randomly popping up on corners playing paparazzi, I had a leaf frog passing war with one particular set of not-super-pleasant or friendly, young high school cross country running ladies, and I kept putting one foot in front of the other. And there were hills. Holy crap, there were hills. Later I learned that this particular 5K is notorious for being one of (if not the most) the hilliest courses in VT. Yeah. And I picked it (unwittingly) for my first race. Yep. That's how I roll - difficult at 10, all the time, Spartan Style. LOL.
I also have to take this moment to thank the bejeezus out of my running buddy, Lisa. We matched pace well with each other, and she was instrumental in coaching me through a few tough spots (I'm looking at you, last hill to home stretch). She had an amazing way of giving me a helpful pointer, while holding her pace steady and encouraging me to just keep moving. Sometimes, that's really all you need - someone to remind you to keep your mind over matter - your body can handle this, but are you going to push for it? Or are you going to talk yourself into it being okay to walk? She kept just giving me steady reminders - slow breaths, run to that pole... now keep running to the sign... just keep moving... , interspersed with a slew of encouragement and just general positive vibe. I couldn't have asked for a better buddy.
Before I knew it, we were in the home stretch.... which turned out to be a lovely downhill (we revisit the evil Cliff street beginning, just going in the other direction), which allowed me to stretch my legs a bit.... only to turn the corner to one more long, slow uphill, with a turn to the finish line. I could SEE it. I could SEEEEEE the finish line. ..... I could also see that lady in front of me. Yes. I admit, I am a competitor. I don't like to lose. Yes, I was "running my own race", but somehow, in my head if she was that close to me, then she was running in my race too, damnit. On sheer will I held strong up the hill, but she was still in front of me. Unacceptable. We hit the corner, the flat, and literally, the sprint to the finish. That last hill had winded me a bit, and my lungs wanted me to walk...... but in a few seconds, I thought of why I was there, everyone that was behind me and how much I wanted to accomplish in the future, and admittedly, how I was *NOT* going to round the finish corner WALKING, and from somewhere (no idea where, as the hilly course had really felt like it killed me), I pulled out just a smidge more Awesomesauce. I turned to Lisa, eeked out a short, breathy "Let's Go." and let loose. Some unused set of afterburners kicked in and I SAILED by the lady I had been chasing in front of me. It felt awesome to just run, full out, with the knowledge that I could use it all up, and didn't need to 'pace myself' for what might lie around the next corner. There was cheering. People were a blur..... and I got it. I was smiling. I felt strong, accomplished, fast (at least for a moment), and pretty damn good.
It was a great day, BlogLand.
Today's Stats were:
Time: 34:43
Distance: 5K
Pace: 11:12 min/mi
.... and yes, THAT my friends, is a new PR. 11:12 min/mi - despite the hills - is my currently reigning best mile time. I guess that competitive vibe gave me just a little bit of an extra mental push.
So... needless to say, I had a good time. I find myself eagerly anticipating the next starting line (and maybe moreso, the next finish line). ... I'm thinking The Great Santa Run (they give you a santa suit to run in!!!), at the beginning of December...
I am happy to report that the time-off of running may be just what I needed for my foot, because as of right now, I'm still pain free. Did a little more icing tonight, just to make sure, and perhaps a bit more rolling tomorrow... but, all is well (or at least better!) there.
Good times, Blog, good times. It was a great race, a beautiful day, and my two legs and feet carried me through to an important personal victory. YAY!
Incidentally, if anyone would like to stalk the set of awful photos my Paternal Unit took, feel free and click here....
Tomorrow, we discuss a new topic and it's impacts....: Carbs, I love you, but you're just not good for me..... Stay Tuned!
Friday, October 28, 2011
“Many of the great achievements of the world were accomplished by tired and discouraged men who kept on working.”
Dear Blog. I'm sorry. Life has just kicked my ass in the last few days, via some family bullshit, as well as internet outages, OT at work, and other assorted craziness. It makes me angry, because it's not a good excuse. But, my brain checked out, I think. SO... I am admitting publicly that I did no form of physical work-out on Day 97 and 98. I definitely iced my foot, and tried to keep my mental marbles in my head (harder than you might think).
THAT said, yesterday, Day 99, I got myself back together and got up early for the before-work WOD. It has been really hard to adjust to the new hours. My work hours are now 10am-7pm, which makes post-work wod's nearly impossible... Thus, I must get up in the morning, and get my Spartan on. This... may be my greatest challenge, yet. I loathe mornings more than anything. You could never understand the extent to which my very CELLS struggle that early, unless you've actually witnessed me at that time of day. However, I'm kicking my own ass. Soon (next week), I will be doing CrossFit a few (EARLY. Holy Crap. Gym at 6:45am?! WHAT?) mornings a week. I think I just need to get into the new routine and soon, my inner Spartan will get on board.
So, Day 99's WOD. It felt harder than usual, but I did it, nonetheless. It was a Swing/Lift Day (I'm on a temp run-hiatus):
- T-Handle Swings (25#), 20 sec on/10 off, 9 rounds.
- DB Thrusters (22# DBs), 6 reps, 8 sets


Pretty, right? :-)
Alright, BlogLand... Off to pack some clothes for post-race breakfast out, and try and get to sleep...
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
"The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong at the broken places." -Ernest Hemingway
Woo, BlogLand! It's been an interesting couple of days.
Yesterday, I took my pet rock (...Grover... and no, that was not of my doing. lol.) out for a walk, up a mountain. Grover is (er, was... more on that later) a solid 17.5#, and the mountain was Spruce Peak, in Plainfield, VT. Just for sake of discussion, it appears that this particular climb is 4.4 miles round trip, with an elevation gain of 1093 ft.
I managed to wrangle in an enthusiastic potential Spartan, who thought throwing a rock up a mountain sounded like a fun way to spend a Sunday. Here's the before picture of my victim. I mean... recruit:
![]() |
Grover, Me, and Steff |
We look so fresh, and perky. Grover is still intact (*sniffle*), and the adventure begins. Not too far up the trail, Steff acquired her own rock (Peanut), and the real good time began. I think we tried out just about every type of throw one could imagine. There's the overhead hulk-smash, the underhanded granny bowl, the right or left handed shot put, the tricky right or left sided twisting and heave, or the beloved backwards over the head kamikaze...
There did seem to be a real technique onto where/how to throw it on a mountain trail, however... Things to consider: Throw it OVER/past the parts that you need two hands to navigate. What happens if you heave it out there and it goes wonky and now you find yourself on safari through the side of a mountain forest, calling for your rock? Ponder the splash radius of a 17.5# solid object landing in a particular squishy mud area. What about the dreaded roll-back issue?
This was a far more complicated process than just "throw rock up hill".
It was a gloriously muddy, wet, overcast day, with just enough chill in the air to keep us from being puddles of sweat. Which, I suppose, really wouldn't have mattered, as we were covered in mud, anyway.
This is where I would like to take a moment to note that Steff and I, while in the process of Chicking ("What is “Chicked”? Chicked is a racing term that defines when a man is passed on the course by a woman!" - Shawty Spartan) the mountain AND throwing big rocks, managed to totally Chick an entire group of relatively youthful hikers. We got some raised eyebrows, and a few comments to the effect of "What, it wasn't hard enough already?" but on we pressed.
And, 2.2 miles and about 1:45 min later, here we stood - Summit!
![]() |
Spruce Peak: Summit |
Oh, and because they felt that we were stealing the show, Grover and Peanut insisted on their own scenic moment:
![]() |
Peanut (L), Grover (R) |
Let me tell you BlogLand, the trickiest thing I did all day was carry a rock up those stairs, thus having only one free hand. It was slow going. My arms were tired. My eyes kept looking at the spaces between stairs. Nonetheless, we were once again met with success, hoisting our rocks for scenic pictures from the even-higher height. I'm not even going to discuss the nerve-wracking adventure the trip down those stairs was. I will leave it at the fact that Steff, Peanut, Grover and I survived, in one piece. With most of our sanity.
Thus, after a wee snack, we began our decent... and quickly learned an important lesson. If you value your Pet Rock, you must NOT throw him/her down a rocky mountain trail. Even if you threw him/her UP said trail. Why? Physics, people. When you throw UP a trail, yes, you have some pretty good muscled force. When you throw DOWN the trail, not only do you have your muscled force (albeit a bit less, after about 2 hours of exertion), but you also have gravity on your side. Grover and I found this out the hard way. He is not nicely smooth (he originated in a river bed) anymore, and let's just say I have a nice little Baby Grover paperweight for my desk at work.
So, if you can not throw, you must carry. Carrying said rock proves to be decidedly more fatiguing for me than throwing it. It was a long 2 miles down. Left shoulder. Right shoulder. Front Carry. Overhead carry. 17.5# gets heavy when it stays in one spot too long (my shoulder bruises may attest to this...).
Nonetheless, we did get in a few more throws on the way down, on the softer spots. Here are the obligatory, unflattering, action shots:


![]() |
Spruce Peak Conquered! |
Saturday, October 22, 2011
You must do the thing you think you cannot do. ~Eleanor Roosevelt
Just a quick update today, as I'm not feeling in the chatty mode, BlogLand....
Foot is still ouchy. Tennis ball rolled it, took some ibuprofen and taped it up... Hoping for a speedy recovery. Oh, and I took this as a good excuse to buy some new shoes. Didn't get the Pumas that I really wanted, but scored a nice pair of Saucony's that feel much better on the foot. I think for a little bit, while this heals (or gets less inflamed, or whatever the hell is going on) I'm going to have to wear the squishier shoes. Dear Inov8's, I still love you best. Promise.
Today was a Swing/Lift workout. Done fast, no more than 10 sec breaks, and got real sweaty:
- T-handle swings: 25#, 9 sets (20 sec swing/10 sec off)
- DB Thrusters: 22# DB's, 6 reps, 9 sets
Friday, October 21, 2011
The battles that count aren't the ones for gold medals. The struggles within yourself - the invisible, inevitable battles inside all of us- that's where it's at. - Jesse Owens
Frustrating day today, BlogLand. It was Run Day today, and I was actually looking forward to it. It's been several days since I've had a run, and I was anticipating getting out there to stretch my legs, and see what I could do.
So, I suit up (yeah, 50 degrees is not warm, I've come to conclude!) and head out. My foot felt okay in my sneakers, I assume it's on the up and up (it's been okay for a few days now), so I didn't think anymore about it, and off I went.
Everything started out fine.... first mile in 10 minutes, with no walks, no feeling like I need to walk, no calf cramps and a steady rhythm. Everything felt GOOD. Another half a mile goes by, and all is well... you know, just enough distance to get me to the apex of my run - the point at which I am the farthest from my house. Then, as I'm going along, I begin to notice my foot. Like, it didn't 'hurt' per se, but I notice it was not 100%. Hmmm.... I think to myself that I should probably ice it when I get home, but it didn't hurt, so it must be okay. Like 2 minutes later... OW. OW,ow, OW. OWWWWW, and I drop into a tentative walk, to assess the issue. My foot hurts. A lot. Like, putting my full weight to walk on it is not comfortable at all. As in, not comfortable to the extent that I was forced to make that pain-wince face, every time I stepped on it.
.... and I was 2 miles from home. EXCELLENT. I thought, well... I have to get home some how, so I'll try and go home the 'shorter' way - which made me instantly angry, that my body had betrayed me like this. EFF you foot, today was supposed to be run day, and I *wanted* to run. I did experiment a little bit, to find that actually a slow run, sort of gingerly, was more comfortable than trying to walk (less pressure on that particular part of my foot?). Thus, I had a totally exhilarating (can you sense the dripping sarcasm?) hobble-limp-jog the last stretch back to my house.
And then, (We're about honesty here, don't judge!) all hot and sweaty and angry, I sat on my front step (the cool air felt good) and put my head in my hands and found myself tearing up with frustration (and a side of throbbing pain.). I KNOW shit happens. I do. Particularly training with this sort of frequency, no matter how careful you are, odds are that something is going to happen eventually. The truly frustring part is that 1) this didn't even happen training. It just started one day, walking around, after training. 2) There is absolutely nothing I can do to fix it, other than just straight out will it better with my mind 3) Why right NOW? I say that because not only is the 'good' outside running time on it's way out here in Vermont, but that next weekend - exactly a week from tomorrow - I am signed up for my very first 5K race.
Yep, I took a big leap of faith today (before I went for my run...) and registered for a 5K next weekend. My name is officially on the list, they will be expecting me. I never in a million years thought I would do something like that. But... here I am. Signed up for a 5K race. And, was (key word) feeling pretty confident that I could do it and manage a respectable time... at least not be last.
... and then I go for my run today (which is typically longer than a 5K) intending to test out my speed through 5K, and this foot thing goes down. It's not better, I suppose. But it needs to get better, as I'm running that 5K next weekend, either way, damnit.
So... came home tonight and alternated ice packs and hot packs on my foot (why is it SO HARD to put my foot ON ice, when I can sit in an ice bath, no problem???), and it seems to feel much better. The plan is to bust out the kinesiotape tomorrow and get that on there, get some more Ibuprofen in my system, and acquire some squishier sneakers. My guess it that the impact/pressure is what upset it? So as much as I ADORE my inov8's, it may be that I need some more traditional squishy sneakers for a few weeks (I need them for around anyway) to take the pressure off.
Oh, and you're wondering why I'm not just headed to the doctor (because that would be what a smart person would do at this point)? Well, with my new job, my health insurance isn't effective until November 1st. Yeah. 2 days AFTER my race. Although, if it's not better by Monday, I think I may just have to suck it up and go, and just suffer the bill that may come. Yikes.
Anyway, for the sake of discussion, here's today's Run Stats:
Time: 28:43
Distance: 2.43 mi
Average Pace: 11.49 min/mi.
All things considered, I guess it wasn't that bad from a statistical sense.... just bad from a physical sense.
Alright, let's end on a happy note, so I don't get myself all worked up about this foot thing, right now (hang on, my hot pack is ready.):
I went out last night with some of my favorite people, that I see infrequently. It was an amazing experience. I was given a barrage of compliments on how good I looked (yes, loosing 65# and gaining toned muscle will create that shock value), but better than that, I was told (by multiple people) that I was a huge inspiration to them to get their workouts back in gear. People that I am only sort of friends-of-friends with told me that they keep track of me and my WODs on FB, and it helps motivate them. Another girl asked ME (ME!!!) for advice on her current gym boredom issues, and what was keeping me motivated. AND, while many responded with disbelief in their own abilities to do rock throws, or the like, most of them expressed interest in working out with me sometime to check it out.
That amazes me. Who would of thought? However, it feels really great to know that even though I struggle, and it's hard, and I have a long ways to go, that my journey may help someone else, too.
The best compliment I got all evening, was from one of my oldest and dearest friends. He told me that he loves the new, confident Aja. When I asked what was "different", he told me that he felt that it seemed that now I knew how powerful I was and embraced that. He went on to say that I had an aura of strength and peace about me that I haven't had in a long time.
I suppose that having a pet rock, mastering the squat, and fraternizing with some of the most Rad-tacular people on the planet (I'm looking at you, Spartans!) will do that for you. :-)
Thursday, October 20, 2011
All great deeds and all great thoughts have a ridiculous beginning. ~ Albert Camus
Oh My BlogLand. Having a social life, outside of workouts, is demanding. I just had to swap around my entire workout schedule, so I could make today a 'rest' day, so I can go to a friend's Birthday festivities this evening.
Geesh. No worries. We'll run tomorrow. (All things considered, letting my weird foot injury chill a little bit more probably isn't the worst thing. )
I feel a tiny bit guilty. But then, I have to remind myself, this is a lifestyle... and to do that, I must also have a LIFE.
So, off I go, to have a bit of fun.... and tomorrow, I promise my run will be epic! Waha!
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
“Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.” ~ T. S. Elliot
I am happy to report that I'm really back on track, BlogLand. I'm feeling awesome (it was a good day all around, more or less), and physically I feel pretty good - minus the wee foot injury that is still nagging.
It was supposed to be a Run Day for me today, but there's the nagging foot thing. It seems to be on the mend, and it's feeling 'okay'... and I probably could've run on it. However, my logical brain says that one more day of ibuprofen, ice and rest is probably the right answer - particularly because I want to be in tip-top shape in about a week and a half (*gulp* 5k!).
So, in lieu of a run, I decided to go for something also of the cardio-evil nature - so it's Swing Day!
Here's the WOD: (with a 25# t-handle, and 2, 22# DB's)
- Warm up: 5 min jump rope (only stopped once!)
- Tabata T-handle swings: 9 rounds
- Thrusters: 6 reps x 8 sets
“If you can find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn’t lead anywhere.” ~ Frank A. Clark
Well BlogLand, it was a much better day today. I think sometimes you just need to have those crappy days, and get them out of your system.
Today, was a Crossfit day for me, despite this foot thing. Seriously, no idea what I did, but it hurts like crazy to walk on. Although, a bunch of Ibuprofen, icing it and generally just dealing with it seem to make it better. Hmm. Felt okay with my sneakers on (vs. pretty work shoes), so I voted that Crossfit was a 'go', regardless.
First off, I would like to start by saying I am currently suffering from Screaming Ring Dip Shoulder & Back Syndrome. Other victims of this terrible disease will understand. Maybe I should explain the skills and the Wod, before I continue to whine?
We began with a 5 min Jump Rope. Gotta warm up you know. I knew it might be an interesting day when the two 18 year old high school football players were visibly annoyed that they couldn't jumprope more than 10-15 consecutively... and I could. Seriously, the short one and I had a bit of a stare down, somewhere around minute 4, when I was still going. Yeah, biatch, I do this ALL.THE. TIME. (Thanks, GT. Who knew this torture of yours would come in handy for gym-time Chicking?) All was well until Tiny Hercules (Lisa, the trainer of the day), decided I should bust out at least 10 double unders. Consecutively, I got 4 (new PR! lol), but managed the 10.
Then, to continue our warm up, we move onto a 400m row... Good stuff. A different sort of challenge there. One of those brain things, where you try and keep the right form through the activity, while regulating your breathing...
After that, onto some skills building (this is my LAST "learning class" YAY!). Today, we did cleans and squat cleans with a bar and with a KB. I beasted a 40# KB through those, as we had run out of 'lighter' ones, and the rest of the class (including the dudes! weren't up for it. Tiny Hercules decided I was. I swear, she's out to kill me.). 40# is not really a lot, but I have a much harder time maneuvering it for cleans/squat cleans at that size. I would much rather lift MORE weight, but on a bar. .... And then I got my wish. More weight on the bar for me, and a whole lot of small sets of squat cleans, in particular. Apparently, my class was struggling with this form, and (because I squat a lot, and have been for a while)
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
"If you believe you can, and believe it strongly enough, you'll be amazed at what you can do." - Nido Qubein
It was a day today, BlogLand. It was one of those kind that I succumb to every now and again, and I really don't want to document it on paper... but, for the sake of the completeness of this blog, the accountability of it, and the honesty I've promised from the beginning, here goes.
... Read on at your own risk... but it turns out okay in the end. Promise.
As I get deeper entrenched into this training and lifestyle (which I love, incidentally), many things have happened. I've met tons of new people, gained inspiration and motivation from people I've never met and felt connected through a common thread of desire to push to the limits.
Although (here it comes) I will admit to you, often those same people - who 99% of the time serve as the most excellent training motivators, because they force me to want to be better, and never get complacent - occasionally trigger one of my own greatest Achilles heels: Self-doubt. Most days, for instance, I look at the women of Sparta running their marathons, doing handstand pushups, dominating every event they enter and I think, YES. I want to be like that, I'm going to train hard and someday I'll keep up with her. Or, I'll someday have abs like that! or be able to bust out 100 burpees! But then.... some days, when other parts of my life aren't going well, or the negative voices around me have gotten particularly loud, or there's just life clutter in my brain, those thoughts take a complete 180... Who am I fooling? I'm never going to be able to run 10 miles. This fat chick will never look like a Glamazon. How do I think I'm going to get over a 8ft vertical wall, or climb a rope? I don't have that arm strength. Why did I ever think that I could become something I don't know how to be? I'll never belong in that crowd... and on... and on... Seriously, you can only imagine.
Tonight was one of those nights. I somehow managed to injure my foot yesterday (unrelated to my run). Nothing serious I don't think, but enough that I was limping today all day, and it's not feeling much better. I spent the evening soaking it in a bucket of hot water, and then icing it and back and forth. Incidentally, it seems to feel a bit better... but, we shall see.
Basically, I came home from work and was tired. I haven't been sleeping all that great. In my tired brain, I allowed myself to get sucked into a conversation with my roommate, comfy clothes and the evening time-suck began. But, legitimately, my foot was hurting like a mo-fo. Then, I made dinner, which turned out horribly.... and I was unsatisfied. And feeling down. And feeling pain (seriously, wtf, foot?)... and rather than do something productive, like my scheduled workout, I did some mindless snacking and eating (which I haven't done in quite a long time). .... and immediately felt guilty. I didn't even WANT to do that. I WANTED to do my workout. But it was (by then) 10 pm, and my foot effing hurt, and my brain wouldn't stop telling me I felt ridiculous about all this, and why even bother, and all those things. I tell you, my brain knows JUST what to say.
I felt guilty because I let my own self-doubt get in the way, and I knew it. I felt like I've been fighting a battle in vain, to be a person that I can't be....
... however, in my old age, I have at least learned to recognize these moods and recognize them for what they are. Don't get me wrong, that doesn't make them easier.... but sometimes, it does make them a little easier to isolate. As in, "TODAY" I fell down... but TOMORROW I will get back up. Not just one big crash and burn. One foot in front of the other, and move through it.
So, BlogLand... I am here to report in. I did not work out today. I should've. I have no excuse. I did let my self-image demons get the better of me, and whisper the seeds of doubt....
But here I am.
Not. Done. Yet.
Taking this time to remind myself that this is for ME, not anyone else, or to be like anyone else. This is to lose MY last 45#, to show myself that I can do things I never thought I could, to live a lifestyle I'm proud of, and to have something to look back at and say, "Yeah, I DID do that." (... I'm coming for you, Amesbury Spartan Sprint, 2012!).
In the process, there will be these days. And I'm learning, slowly, that that's okay. I'm human, and all the crazy emotions and personality and crap that goes with it, is why I am who I am.
So... the net result: I'm going to bed. Today is over, and with it, I'm letting go of the ugly thought processes. Tomorrow, I will wake up, as Spartan as ever, attack my work day, then cruise over to CrossFit and own that workout, with all the sweat, drive and heart that I have in me.
Why? Because someday, I'm going to do handstand push-ups, too.
Sunday, October 16, 2011
“When someone tells me “no,” it doesn’t mean I can’t do it, it simply means I can’t do it with them.”~ Karen E. Quinones Miller
I had a wee bit of a frustrating day today, BlogLand. All I wanted to do was hike up a little mountain that is near me, throw my rock all the way up, and enjoy some foliage at the top. I was prepared to go alone. Then I talked to my mother (yes, I'm almost 30) and she gave me a lecture about the safety of that, blah blah blah... and pulled the "I'm your MOTHER!" card. So. I modified my plans. Annoyed and frustrated, I decided to go for a run and add some mileage, which I did.
Today's Run looked like this:
Time: 51:07
Distance: 4.33 mi.
Average Pace: 11.48 min/mi.
Was definitely feeling a little slow today, but I figured slow and steady was alright, as long as I got the mileage out there. 4.33 is a new personal best for me, by a whole . 18 of a mile. LOL. Good times. I was definitely running emotional today, though.
I'm beginning to come up against interesting situations during this whole training process, particularly with my friends. Being a super social person, I don't always like to be doing stuff on my own - I *want* to share those experiences with my friends, make new friends, whatever. However, it seems that my recent fitness progress has made that impossible, with the people I know. None of my current friends will participate in any sort of exercise activity with me - running, hiking, whatever. I understand the issue intellectually. These friends that I have are part of the "unfit" not-motivated (I still haven't managed to drag them off the couch) culture that I was able to extricate myself from. Now, I have different expectations for myself (I'd like to go for a hike on a Sunday instead of sitting on the couch, for example), but they have not changed. And no one seems willing to. I asked one of my very best friends if she'd hike up the small mountain with me today, promising to go REAL slow and throw a rock the whole way to really slow me down, thus evening out our paces.... but she still gave me a hell no, and she wouldn't even try. And so, I found myself out running alone, instead.
While I know I'm not alone in this journey - I've got lots of people around me virtually supporting me - it is hard, sometimes on the day to day, to constantly have to be alone. I do look forward to my times at Crossfit, because it's a group of people perusing the same goal. I have to say, this is the first time in my life that I'm having a difficult time pulling people from my friend group into new interests in my life.
It would just be nice, sometimes, to have someone or two to try out a new running trail with, or take our Pet Rocks for a throw, or bust out the bikes... or.... I dunno. ANYthing. I guess this is the pain of changing... Some people will let you change and be happy for you... some people with watch you change and fight it the whole way. It's time for me to adopt some more people around me, I think, that can share in these new interests with me.
I'm now accepting applications for new randomly active friend, game for rock throwing, interested in sandbag making, and won't blink an eye at getting muddy.... any takers???
"Your toughness is made up of equal parts persistence and experience. You don't so much outrun your opponents as outlast and outsmart them, and the toughest opponent of all is the one inside your head." - Joe Henderson
I can't help but notice the weather lately, BlogLand. Here in scenic Vermont, it's definitely been some chilly, windy fall weather, with a generous rainy contribution. I'm pretty okay with that, as I've determined that I don't mind running in the rain, and I'd MUCH rather run with a slight chill (as that is only temporary) than slog through the heat. However, I ponder what will happen once the snow flies. Yes. I said the S word. It's inevitable... it's decidedly not odd for us to start getting flurries (even a dusting or so) by Halloween. And then what will I do? Being pretty new to running, I suddenly have lots of questions to research (any input, Readers?):
- Do I still run when there's snow on the sidewalk?
- What sort of shoes do I need to acquire to have successful winter runs?
- What kind of different/special clothes will I need?
- What if it's too icy to run, what's the next best workout substitute (a huge concern, as winters are LONG in Vermont... I don't want to be not-running from November-March...)
Hmm. Lots to think about. Although, on the upside, I did just learn that they've put in an Under Armour OUTLET like 35 min from my house.... that means I ought to be able to acquire all KINDS of excellent sporty clothing. Woot! (I feel that winter running is an valid and perfectly legitimate excuse for shopping.)
Anyway, on to today. It was a real lazy feeling day today. I was tired last night and really hit the pillow hard. Slept in late (weekends have taken on a new meaning, now that I'm working M-F again...), and wandered around in the comfy clothes for a while, chatting with the roommate and just generally relaxing and enjoying having no place to be. I DID utilize that off time to update my whiteboard workout calendar schedule, as we're officially into weeks 13-16 now.
It was a WEE bit scary, as I officially put on the calendar the 5K race that I'm going to do at the end of this month. It's one of my milestone goals (see the sidebar to the right) and one so close to being checked off. I'm nervous though... I still have trouble viewing myself AS a runner (even though I run. Often.), and have some anxiety about looking stupid ("What if I'm LAST? What if I'm that slow, fat chick in the back?!"). I know, intellectually, that these are not reasonable concerns. That simply the fact that I'm there, doing it negates many of those... but... still. Body transformations are much easier than mental switches, sometimes. I look in the mirror and still (often) see 284# me, who could not dream of ever being one of "those people" that ran races.
However, I've been reading some really inspiring stories lately - of people getting through their first 5K, or first Spartan race, or any number of other 'firsts'... and I feel reassured. Not to mention the fact that even if I have to run it alone (and I will, if it comes to that!), I know that there are lots of people out there who virtually have my back and are cheering me on. (Secretly, I'm really hoping that my Mud Mafia t-shirt comes in before then, so I can sport that and feel like I'm racing with a whole virtual team!)
Anyway, enough about that. I have two whole weeks more to freak out about that, and/or reach some sort of Zen place. I'm thinking that next weekend I'm going to go scout the course and perhaps run it, so I know what I'm up against. Take away one of the scary 'unknowns', you know?
Today's WOD was a Body weight workout day. I see so much progress in these workouts, but I really do hate them. haha. These are HARD. Hard in a different way than Crossfit, or Running, or lifting something really heavy... I dunno. Weird.
WOD looked like this (all unweighted):
- 5 min: Jump rope w/u (I'm getting good at this and working on some successful double unders... stay tuned!)
- Squats - 80
- Push ups - 50
- Split Squats - 60 (I also figured out how I was getting weird rug burn on the tops of my foot/toes... put your foot on the arm of a couch for split squats and see what happens. lol.)
- Dips - 40 (being mindful to keep my body *just* in front of the chair, not out forward, stressing my shoulders)
- Calf raises - 30
- Lunges - 30
- Scissor Kicks - 40
- Ball Crunches - 40
- Burpees (...of DEATH) - 10
Friday, October 14, 2011
What I feel like Running...
It was Rest Day today, BlogLand (Ahhh....). But, I did come across a picture that cracked me up, that I really empathized with, so I felt I needed to share!
It really gives a visual representation to the whale-human hybrid sentiment that we noted a month or so ago.... LOL
Enjoy:
Thursday, October 13, 2011
“If you aren’t going all the way, why go at all?” ~ Joe Namath
(Week 13, Day 1)
So, just another day in the neighborhood today... Although I did run across this quote (to the left) that I liked.
Today was a Swing/Lift Day. I kind of love these days, oddly enough. I've missed them, because I've had to sub in my Crossfit OnRamp classes (almost done with those!) for the Lift/Swing days. I've determined that I really do like t-handle and/or kettlebell work though. Swinging just maintains more of an air of "fun" even when I'm working real hard. It is amazing how quickly doing tabata swings can really get you puffing. I was pushing today, to try and work out some of regular work-frustration, while still trying to maintain good form. That, dear BlogLand, is harder than one may think. It's real temping to round your back, etc. when trying to go fast and get in more swings.
Today's WOD:
- T-Handle tabata swings, 22#, 9 rounds
- Thrusters (22# db's), 6 reps, 8 sets
“Continuous effort, not strength or intelligence is the key to unlocking our potential.” ~ Liane Cardes
Stealing an excellent quote for today:
After a whole quarter of a year of this crusade toward a better version of me, here's some things I've accomplished, for the record:
- Arguably the most prominent accomplishment: I've gone from running maybe a minute at a time, to running a solid 4.15 miles (at a respectable just over 11 min/mile).
- I have developed one bad-ass set of squat muscles, allowing me to not get out of breath at 5-10 bodyweight squats, but to easily squat 5, 10 rep sets of 60#, in a Crossfit wod.
- I can do a push-up. They're still not pretty, and half of them are still on my knees, but I *can* actually do a full, clean push-up AND a BURPEE (...of Death), for that matter.
- I am a third of the way (ish) to doing a pull up. I have mastered the 'negative' portion... now if I could just get it UP (... that's what he said? lol)
- I transitioned from 12# db's for workouts, up to handling 24# db's.
- Less tangibly, I've stopped caring what other people think. Yes, I'm going running and going to get sweaty. Yes, my goal is to be able to run Spartan Races. Yes, I have a pet rock (who seems to have gotten dubbed "Grover". hmm.). YES, I am doing something you don't understand.
- I've begun to accept myself as a budding athlete. (For anyone who's spent any time carrying a significant amount of extra weight, you understand how difficult "seeing" the new you can be. )
- Perhaps the Most Difficult, I'm learning to Ask for Help, and not feel dumb for doing so. This is a process. A long, painful one ("embrace the suck!!"), of which I often have no idea where to go next. This is to be expected. BUT there are people out there who DO know and who will help (and who have been there before me). Be it my incomparable GT, to the collective knowledge of the Spartan Chicks, to the Crossfit trainer who empathizes with my tight hamstrings, to my Mom who literally, simply told me the other day, "You're doing a good job."
- Maybe most importantly, I'm HAPPY. I feel well; physically, my chronic aches and pains are gone, and I'm on the right path to reach my healthy weight; mentally, I sleep better (more or less!), a regular supply of happy workout-endorphin can't be bad, and I feel like I have a significant purpose, even when there are other things in my life that aren't perfect or controllable.
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
"We could not have gotten where we are without coming the way we came." ~ Stephen Covey
Ahhh... If ever there would've been a good day for an ice bath, it would've been last night. Feeling super triumphant from my new PR run last night, I hit the pillow HARD. I woke up this morning, feeling the fatigue in my legs, for sure. I was still rockin' the Kinesio tape on my stupid tweaked ankle, which I think saved me, but other that that, it all just felt tired. I'm thinking that's a pretty major success.
For any of my readers not in the know, I have a host of old (horseback riding related) injuries to my knees/ankles. When you add a whole lot of extra weight on those things, which is what I was doing for several years, without the muscle to compensate, etc. you get a lot of hurt. Soreness, pain, OUCH. Not good. That was part of what made me begin this journey. Not only did I see a horrific picture of myself that really woke me up, I was constantly sore in my knees to the point where I was chewing a lot of ibuprofen and icing them, to no avail. Only solution was to lose weight and get in shape (apparently, regular exercise helps lubricate joints!).
I am happy to report that I have been completely pain-free for over a year now. Like nothing. No pain. At all. EVEN after running 4.15 miles. (yes, I had fatigue pain, but no ouch pain!) I NEVER thought that that would be something I'd be able to do. I would like to note that I'm even running in minimalist shoes (inov8 230's), so it's not like running on a whole lot of cushion either. Woot! If NOTHING else comes of this (which isn't possible), I will live the rest of my life being eternally grateful for not being in chronic pain.
Whew. Okay. Off soapbox. :-)
Today's workout was an evening at Crossfit - I'm ALMOST done the intro classes to allow me to join the regular Wod's.
Tiny Hercules (what I respectfully call Lisa, at GMCF) may have tried to kill me... Or at least that's what my arms and shoulders are saying now. haha
The learning portion of the evening included Thrusters and Front Squats, as well as Kettle bell cleans and KB Thrusters, with an assortment of dips, Jumping Pulls ups, sit ups and all sorts of other good things, 10 at a time. Yikes. I tell you, those little things will wear you down, over the course of an hour.... and THEN, we move onto the WOD:
10 min. AMRAP:
10 Thrusters (40#)
10 Sit ups
10 Jumping Pull Ups
I got through 5 strong rounds, which felt good. Sweaty and do-able. Yeeeah! The Jumping pull ups even felt GOOD today. Like, No big pauses in between jumps, just hit and up again. AND, the negative portion of the pull up (the down) felt strong. Like, I could really feel the difference from even May (When I did an initial Crossfit intro). One of my big goals is to be able to do a pull up by next summer, and I am really believing that it is attainable. Rawr!
With that....
I think I'm off to throw some icepacks on my shoulders, check on my baking (Trying out Shawty Spartan's J&J Protein Bars...), and chill. :-)
"We acquire the strength we have overcome." Ralph Waldo Emerson
So, WHAT a most excellent day today, BlogLand.
Perhaps I should first justify my absence for the last couple of days? Let's just say I was doing my own patented WOD's, named "Debauchery" and "Recovery". Sometimes, everyone needs a weekend (and a ragingly good one, it was. :-) )
THAT said, I think that my legs may have benefited from the extra time off, because today was Run Day. The notorious calf-cramp had subsided, I was feeling good (Well... 90%. My prone-to-rolling from a slew of old injuries ankle was a wee bit twingy from some portion of this weekends specialiazed "Wod's"... lol... But it was Kinesio-taped-up and ready to roll. No pun intended.).
I decided to mix it up today, as I REALLY wanted to bust out of this 3-ish mile bubble I've been stuck in, and hit the 4mi. I was determined to do it before the end of this long weekend. Thus, I went up to a run spot that I've been meaning to try for a while. It's a popular place with the locals, as it features a lovely 5ish (I think?) mile dirt road loop around a scenic pond. However, included in this loop are a well-used 2.2mi long "flat side"... and then the notorious "back side" (ie, is a whole lot of serious up and down hills) of the pond. I've walked this spot many times (the entire loop), but decided that if I was going to go for my 4 miles, this might be an excellent place to do it. Why? Well, to be honest, because it would be an out-and-back run (not a loop, like I do in the city), there is no option but to do the whole thing; No chance at rationalizing why I should do less distance, cut off a block or anything. I wanted to leave no potential variable unaccounted for. Plus, I thought the new spot might give me some new scenery to look at (which was scenic and foliage filled, mind you!) and distract me from my slight trepidation at running that distance.
SO, without further ado, let me give you today's Run Stats:
Time: 46.52
Distance: 4.15 miles (YESSSSS!!)
Average Pace: 11:17 (Not so bad, all things considered.)
And so... I did it. I just ran (a new PR!) more miles than I've ever been able to run in my whole life. Or could even conceive of running, to be honest. The equivalent of a 5K always seemed trainable, manageable, as there are so many success stories of people doing that... but mileage over that always seemed really intimidating. TODAY, I ran a full mile more than a 5K. I probably could've even done more (My legs were feeling good!). I did walk 2x, but both "breaks" were about 15 seconds a piece. I don't know why that helps (because I don't feel like my breathing is an issue), but it does. 5-10 Walk steps, and I'm good to go again. And hey, for a 'non-runner' to bust out 4.15 miles, with only a total walk time of maybe 30 seconds, I'm going to count that a resounding success!
I'm proud of myself today. That was a very large mental wall I just busted through (with no shortage of encouragement from the GT, and some tough love from the Spartan Chicks "just suck it up and do it!").
I think my focus this week, as I bring Week 12 of the Spartan Shape-Up to a close (WOW. Right? 12 weeks!!), is to really get more of a handle on the eating/weight loss portion of things. I still have a ways to go... (I'm about 65# down, with at least another 40# to go... yikes.) and I need to work myself off this particular plateau. The mantra for this week, Mindful Eating. (... keeping in mind, less carbs, more protein, and no unnecessaries!)
Now, I have a date with a couple of ice packs (I'm thinking I may be a bit sore tomorrow, and I should've planned for a long soak in an ice bath...), and then bed. Tomorrow, we get the last Crossfit OnRamp class out of the way!
OH, and before I forget... This week, I intend to sign up for my first 5K. Going to run it by myself, if need be (perhaps I'll be sporting a hot new Mud Mafia shirt...). HOWEVER, if anyone would like to join me and have a lovely scenic jog in VT the last weekend of this month:
Friday, October 7, 2011
Happy are those who dream dreams and are ready to pay the price to make them come true. Leon J. Suenes
Spartan Shape-up, Day 79:
It's a decidedly necessary rest day today... my calf knot has subsided a wee bit, but it's still hurting quite a lot. Particularly going down stairs. Ow. But, it's all good - par for the course during stuff like this. Probably a good slap in the face for me, reminding me to get better about watching what goes in my mouth. If I had kept my potassium up, this probably wouldn't have happened. Grr.
That said, it's going to be a lovely weekend in Vermont. I intend to get in a run at some point, launch the kayak for one last foliage voyage, and just generally enjoy life and times. Ahhh. Rest day. :-)
And so, I'm off to massage my calf, drink some water and chill..... (someone suggested I drink dill pickle juice to make the calf knot go away. Hmm. Perhaps ... )
"Pain in weakness leaving the body..."
OW, BlogLand, OW.
Yes, I was (as predicted) a bit sore in the back and shoulders today... but that good kind of sore that lets you know you found some muscles to work that haven't been challenged in a while. The good sore.
Recognizing the shredded "good sore" that was my upper body today (yeah, reaching for a mouse all day. ouch.), I was glad it was Run Day, today. See, I'm an equal-opportunity fatigue machine. Why not go for total body overhaul? Lol.
So, out I go on my run ... it was brisk out. My goal was to keep a steady pace, nothing fancy, but no walks and try and add some mileage. I started out well, strong, steady and a bit slow... but feeling good. Felt even better when I was coming up on a girl (maybe...20?) who was obviously working on the running thing... I could see her in the distance... Run... run... walk... run... walk.. run ... run.... and I immediately identified. As I closed in on her (I was running steady! Yay!), I was able to pace her for about a block and a half.... It was like staring myself in the face. And I remembered how helpful other people had been to me, so I made sure to egg her on, give her some encouragement and a big smile as we turned separate corners. Good stuff. Powered me on for a while.
Then mile 2 arrived. While I typically start feeling my calves around mile 2, it's not generally an issue. Today, it felt off. Kept running slow, steady pace. More off. Then.... bang. Calf seized into that giant, hard knot that I am oh-too-familiar with. A slow run was more comfortable (than walking) and got me through the last of my run and home.... but OW. It is not good. I haven't had my calf take such vengeance on me in months. It's been good! Even through calf raises and other weird craziness... all this running, everything. Today, it locked up solid. I am currently feeling as though my right calf is about 6 inches shorter than my left calf, and it's REAL angry. I'm formally walking with a hitch in my giddy-up, because it HURTS. Not like, ooo... I worked out today hurts.... but, ooo, I have to go down a set of stairs, and it causes me to physically wince and hobble. GRR.
Nothing to be done, except do it all - ice, heat, bath, water, bananas - and hope that something kicks in, soon. Major OW, Batman. Perhaps it's time to hit up the doc and get my potassium thing checked out again. *sigh*. GRR. Genetics, I love/hate you!
Anyway, today's miles looked like this:
Time: 43.09
Distance: 3.19
Average pace: 11.45 min/mi
Bleh. I'm not happy with that, but my effing muscle didn't leave me much choice. GRRRRR. I hate having my progress impeded by my body's own unwillingness to get on board.
But, miles on my sneakers are miles nonetheless. I actually did kind of enjoy running in the cold, and I did well today keeping a steady (if slow) pace, where I didn't need to walk hardly. Go me.
With that... I'm off to massage my leg more, and try and sleep... Tomorrow, we t-handle Swing!
Thursday, October 6, 2011
"It always seems impossible until it's done." - Nelson Mandela
Ow. I am Aja's angry, entire upper half. OW. I have this sneaking suspicion that tomorrow I am going to wake up feeling like I got hit by a mack truck. At least this is what my shoulders are telling me at the moment. DAMN you, "T-rex" arms. LOL.
Allow me to tell you WHY I may be suffering from exertion-induced-paralysis tomorrow. It was another Crossfit class today. Nearing the end of these mandatory "skills building" classes, then I can join the regular WOD's. However, today worked all my Achilles heel muscles... yes, muscles plural. I have never been particularly burly in my arm/upper body strength. You'll note that my goal on the right is to do ONE, unassisted pull-up. ONE. That's a big thing, people.
Today in Crossfit, we did a vigorous warm-up (Which made me think of that quote, "Your workout is my warm-up!"), and then moved onto the skills building with the lifting. I struggle with overhead squats. I currently do not easily posses the flexibility in my shoulders that would allow me to keep the bar right over my head. I can do it, yes, but while everyone's legs are shaking at the squat part of it, my shoulders and back are burning from trying to open them up and keep them back. I also do not naturally (perhaps related) want to straighten my elbows. I have to repeat that mantra to myself every. single. time. Shannon (badass dude crossfit trainer) made me do squats, with my hands up, with my nose like 3-6 inches from a wall. You laugh. Try this. Harder than one might think... but apparently, it's useful in developing that squat flexibility.
I tell you, though, I can back-squat like it's my JOB. Thank god my genetics gave me a burly lower half. LOL. It keeps me from getting really frustrated, because there are some things I can naturally do well. Remind yourself of those and hang onto them.... Especially when you then hear the words, "Great! Now we're going to talk about Knees-to-elbows!". I tried, BlogLand, I DID. I tried HARD. Can't quite manage the elbows, though.... YET.
So, we did about 45 minutes of sweaty skills building... I was practicing with 40# on the bar, which was way too easy, all things considered... but it was good to get the skills and form down. And be able to concentrate on Elbows Straight! and keeping that bar over my head and not in front of it. I did extra reps (per instructor direction), to make up for it, and get more practice. As we approached somewhere around minute 47, and I was in the down portion of an overhead squat, eyes straight ahead, brain yelling directions, inhaling a breath, ignoring the fatigue in my quads, while trying not to focus on the intense, screaming burning in my shoulders and back.... I realized how much fun I was having. Wait, WHAT? Yes, I was having fun. Capital F.U.N. This was my idea of a good time. OH MY. It's a good thing I have some of the people around me that I do... People that appreciate when I get really excited about weird things ("You should SEE the rubber-mat-burns I have from doing knee-pushups!").
Anyway, then we moved into the actual short WOD:
It was a 7-7-7, AMRAP in 5min.
- Wall Balls (14# ball)
- Pushups (on my knees. Grr.)
- Ring Rows (almost horizontal! Yeaah!)
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
“Developing the plan is actually laying out the sequence of events that have to occur for you to achieve your goal.” ~ George L. Morrisey
Well, today was a Run Day. It was a bit of a lackluster run day, to be honest... It was a nice brisk evening, with a cooling drizzle in the air - all things that should set up for a good run. Then I got stuck longer at the doctors (just a check up, no worries!) than anticipated, and by the time I got home it was already getting dark. I don't live in a booming metropolis. Street lights are rare and creepiness abounds. So, got my sneakers on as quickly as possible and headed out the door. I lost the light fast with the rain clouds and everything, so I made the *responsible* choice and cut my run a little shorter than usual. I figured some miles on the sneakers was better than no miles on the sneakers.
The (short) Run stats:
Time: 22.44 min
Distance: 2.0 mi.
Average Pace: 11:11 min/mi.
I, at least ran it at a relatively decent time for me. I'm feeling a bit 'stuck' on my runs, lately. I consistently run 3.25-3.5 miles, three times a week... and have been for weeks now. It is getting easier, in some senses, but I'm struggling to get over 4 mi. Running my customary distance, I still feel the need to walk here and there. I don't. But sometimes I do have to run real slow to re-gather myself, or un-cramp my calves, etc. I feel like I'm breathing well (I don't feel out of breath), but I seem to struggle having the gas in the tank to keep going. But, physically, I feel like I should be able to handle it, and realistically, probably can. I think I need a push. Something to just get me over that hump... I think I am too much in my head when I get running, because I have such a desire to master it, and I recognize that it may be my weakest point, at the moment. So, instead of just mastering it and getting it done, I start over thinking everything - how fast am I going, my breathing patterns, how far I've gone, how far I've got left to go... I swear, I get WAY too much in my head; today I was even analyzing the exact feelings in my right calf muscle (as it cramped and I ran...). I need to do something to push me hard enough that I *can't* think those thoughts. That will shut up my brain, push me to get the job done and *poof* suddenly prove to my brain that I CAN run at least 4 miles, and that there is a new bar set. I'm thinking a buddy-run may be a good way to knock me out of this rut.
I've also had something else itching at the back of my head of late, that surfaced this evening... When I went to the doctor's, they weighed me. I don't dread this like I used to, because I'm proud of how far I have come (and the doctor even commented on this!). However, like the running, the weight is stuck at this one place. I'm toning and reshaping my body, I can see that in the mirror... but the scale is NOT moving. I still see the significant amount of ... *ahem*... not-muscle... that I'm carrying. That frustrates me. I'm busting my ass in my workouts, hanging onto a consistency and intensity that I've never had before... but I just can't seem to get that scale moving again.
I wouldn't care so much, knowing that I'm making progress in other areas, but I feel like the extra weight is holding me back from pushing forward in my training the way that I want to. It has to be true that the extra weight is making everything just that much more difficult for my body. Like the running, for example; how much more progress would I be making if I was carrying a bit less of me? *sigh*
The hardest fight is the one you have with yourself.
That said, rather than wallow in the impending negativity, I am choosing to make a plan. I'm not really sure what that plan should be at the moment, but I have some decent raw materials to work with - like my food log for the last few weeks. I have been doing that. I also have successfully lost 65#. In theory, that means I do actually know how to lose weight in some sort of healthy way. Why I haven't been accomplishing that, I'm not sure. I do know that this particular set-up of workouts makes me freaking HUNGRY - like for meat. lol. Like, you know when you're starving and your body is like "yeeahhhh, STEAK"... and a Salad really isn't in the cards? Which is where I'm getting hung-up I think. When I successfully lost my weight with Weight Watchers ("Nothing tastes as good as thin feels!"), I was able to eat a bit more rabbit-like, as I wasn't working out anywhere NEAR where I am now. What I was eating then (Translation: what I know how to eat to lose weight) will not work for my current self who requires a lot more protein and frequent snacks. Hmm. A difficult conundrum. I may have to seek out some knowledgeable advice on this topic.
And... there we go, BlogLand. I'm getting ready to tune into my weekly inspirational Spartan Radio, have some tea, chill and refresh my brain...
Don’t pray for lighter burdens, but for stronger backs.”
First, I would like to begin my issuing my sincerest apologies to the Burpee Gods. I'm SO sorry. I know I have cursed your name, laughed you off and refused to pay tribute... but I have been smited (smoten? Smote? wtf?). I have paid for my vocal transgressions, I assure you.
Apparently, putting out to the Universe that you loathe and despise something (Burpees... of Death, for example), reminds the Universe that perhaps you need further education with which to learn the appropriate life lessons around said subject. Last week, I happened to run my mouth a little more than usual about my particular dislike of the Burpee (...of Death), all the while knowing, ultimately, that I dislike them thoroughly because they are exceedingly difficult for me, at this juncture.
I might as well have waved a red flag at the Cosmos, demanding their all-knowing Wisdom, apparently. What happened? Burpees were EVERYwhere. Somehow, I got sucked into a BoD (Burpees... of Death!) weekend with one of the Spartan ladies, where all that was required was spontaneous, random, and frequent drops into a set or two of Burpees - all weekend long. She even called out my Spartan mettle, when I expressed my reluctance to participate. Thus, I Spartan'd the eff up and got my act together; 10 burpees upon rolling out of bed, 10 after breakfast, several sets while catching up on some TV on a rainy weekend, a few while waiting for dinner in the oven... You get the idea. I was proud of myself. Felt as though I had showed the Burpee (... of Death) who was boss... and went to sleep feeling good about my tiny successes over BoD weekend.
... and then I went to Crossfit today. It was another skills-building class for me, today... and guess what one of the essential moves on the list to learn was?... You guessed it: The Burpee (...of Death). So, we practiced (with the pushup, *and* without). Practiced a bit more (apparently, we're looking for a good, smooth, "flow" and some explosive core/hip action...), oh and got some more practice. THEN, we made sure to include those bad boys in our workout - because I assure you we hadn't gotten enough of them, by then. I swear to you BlogLand, by my last Burpee of today, I was kissing a sweat-puddled rubber mat, like it was the feet of a deity, hoping that I was appeasing the Burpee gods, and could be freed of the tiny hell that involved then peeling my jello-like body up off the mat ("with a core explosion!") and popping up into an enthusiastic jump and clap of triumph.
That said, here was today's Crossfit day:
Warmup:
- 300m row
- 10 reps (of pretty much everything in the gym): ball slams, dips, sit ups, squats, lunges, etc.)
Skills Building:
- Deadlift form
- Sumo Deadlift High-Pull form
- Good Mornings
- Back Squat
- Burpees (...of Death)
- Pull-ups/Jumping Pull ups
- Deadlifts (60#)
- Burpees
- Jumping Pull Ups
Sunday, October 2, 2011
"It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else's eyes." - Sally Field
So, more of a check-in today, BlogLand. Today was a rainy Sunday, but that was no excuse... today there was just a lot of Life happening - out of state family visiting, for one - so the WOD just didn't happen. No excuses, no blame, no guilt. It just didn't. But there is tomorrow!
Tomorrow, I'm off to another CrossFit intro class... who knows what that shall hold.
However, success today, in the form of I STILL did my food log, even though I didn't like what I had to put in it, at all. Success. AND, I tried to recruit a few more people to run the 5K at the end of the month with me - which solidifies (keep me accountable) my commitment to doing it. I'm terrified of that, can I admit that? Terrified. I run that distance 3x a week, but the concept of doing it in a *race* absolutely terrifies me. However. I will do it. Alone if I have to.
That said, I came across this great quote, which I identified with:
"If you run, you are a runner. It doesn't matter how fast or how far. It doesn't matter if today is your first day or if you've been running for twenty years. There is no test to pass, no license to earn, no membership card to get. You just run." -John Bingham
Guess what, BlogLand? I'm a runner. Holy shit.
Saturday, October 1, 2011
"Mountains do move... One stone at a time."
It's a rainy, early fall day here in Vermont... 45-50 degrees, with a steady drizzle. AND, a good day to bust out my first run in the rain! I was a little bit apprehensive, as well... it seemed cold. And wet. However, I Spartaned up, and put my sneakers on. Had a bit of restless energy today that definitely needed a more productive outlet than just spinning around in my head, too.
So, let me say the first few minutes was, in fact, a bit chilly. That did seem to work to my advantage though - got me moving right along, thinking "fast feet" and plowing through the rain. Even started having a bit of fun jumping puddles and bounding up curbs. I am pretty sure most of the cars were aiming for the puddles next to me, but EH. I came to the conclusion that you're either going to be wet with sweat and hot and sticky... or you're going to be wet with rain/puddles... and at least then you don't feel hot and sticky. haha. AND, my god, I LOVE my shoes. My Inov-8, f-lite 130's are AWESOME. Awesome, I tell you. I inadvertently splashed through a few puddles, etc. and my feet never felt waterlogged or anything. No wet/friction blisters or anything. Apparently, you DO get what you pay for!! (I can't ever buy cheap sneakers again!)
Anyway, Today's Run stats:
Time: 34.32
Distance: 3.09
Average min/mile: 11.04
OH yes, you read that right. 11.04!!!!! What is that? THAT is 15 seconds faster than my last PR!! YEAH running in the rain! I'm pretty excited about that. I was really feeling like I was never going to get faster... and while that wasn't the focus, it's still a frustrating thing. I did keep in mind something the Spartan chicks use as advice: "If you want to run faster... run faster." Yep, that simple.
I still feel like I could do it a little better... Unfortunately, when I pick up the pace like that and push, I struggle to not have tiny walk breaks - or at least reaaaallll slow jog breaks. If I go slower, I can run the whole thing. BUT, I think that it'll get there. Today felt better than the last time, as evidenced by the time, I would say. I was able to run more consistently. My goal is to be able to run that 11 min/mile (like today, more or less), but run - without walking at all - the whole thing. Soon.
So, glad I ran today. Was a little tough to get rolling today, with the grey skies and everything... but WAHA. Today, conquered!